"Broken Shards"

[zauberdecke]

"In the dark
I need to taste the blood
Go on, draw another line
We can cross this time."
- Blindfold by Sleeping Wolf

---



[ Essek Thelyss: Shadowhand to the Dynasty.

One who reached further then the Luxon would allow, who would do absolutely anything for knowledge. Oh no, the man did not care for power, not really. He wanted to cast himself into the portal of knowing, he wanted to surrender himself to books and learning without having to deal with the mundanities of socio-politics that all of the Kryn engaged in. It was tedious and it filled him with sickness even as he plastered on an urbane smile for all and sundry to see.

Within the Dynasty, it was customary to take pets of the Empire; they were brought in across the border of Asarius, across the mountains and into the Dynasty. There were Dynasty born pets on the other side, both lost to the ravages of the other's civilization, generally never to be seen again.

Essek had never really had an interest to begin with when it came to pets; at the market he carefully avoided the slave blocks where those not of the Dynasty were paraded around. However, it had come to this-- it had come to his trading of the Beacon, and in return he recieved a Volstrucker to serve him. And yet, for all of that, Essek Thelyss had not thought he would receive a broken Volstrucker.

In fair trade, he and recieved a dossier on the man in question and had perused it with only a small semblance of annoyance while Trent Ikithon had assured him that a man like him could be rebuilt, the honeyed words of a silken snake which Essek recognized.

After all did not a predator recognize another predator? So now he held in his household a man whom had to be guarded carefully, though Essek was not cruel despite how he imagined Dynasty pets were treated, the cage that he had placed this Volstrucker named Bren within, well it was comfortable-- he'd seen pictures of Vergossen so he supposed it must be far better than that place. But he had not precisely interacted with him-- most of his unseen servants were given the walking of him, the care and maintenance of him.

Perhaps because he did not precisely know what to do with him, or what use he had for something broken. Though he arguably did not know what manner of broken the Volstrucker was, but after a week-- he decided perhaps it was time to summon him and see for himself; acertain what sort of work was cut out for him.

If this man was worth putting back together again.

So it was one evening, he had the Empire man summoned to his chambers. ]

Comments

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek found that he enjoyed the feeling of those eyes upon him and so he would indulge him in that gaze, a soft caress before finally he moved to where the plates of food were laying out. He was a bit weak, but no where near the level that Bren was-- he heaped the plate with all of Bren's favorites and then came back to the bed so that they could eat and relax.

The afternoon was spent reading and cuddling, just as Bren had been promised. Soft affection and stolen kisses that felt so much like love, but it could've been a soothing aftercare procedure as well-- meant to assuage the rather rough fucking they had engaged in.

Tomorrow they would return to routine, but for today this still belonged to him.

Toward the evening, Adeen knocked on the door but Essek did not answer it-- merely he told Adeen to go away because he was resting. By this time, Essek wondered if Adeen had known what was going on or if he had been listening at the door and heard all of the filthy sounds that the two had made. It would've been unavoidable of course, the sound of two men enraptured within their primal instincts. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren glared at the door when the knocking came, seconds away from lighting the man on the other side of the door on fire. But he refrained, when Essek took care of it and sent him away. For his part, Bren was certain that Adeen would have figured it out. They had not exactly been subtle in their reaction.

Or the sounds that came from the bedroom in that week of days.

Still he was pleased when his Master's horrid husband left and they were alone once more, and he could nestle back down into those arms and indulge in feeling so thoroughly spoiled it was truly obscene.

Eventually night came, and the next day loomed.]

[zauberdecke]

[ As the weeks drifted away, the heat became a think of the past-- a beautiful wonderful memory and both uncertain of when and if it would happen again. Did Essek discreetly tuck some things away for in case it happened again? He did not know if it was a one time thing, but he would not take that risk. Bren would have his walks with Essek, would go to the office with him when it was feasible and stay home when it was not.

There was also the functions to be attended, in which there was a marked hostility in the demeanor of Adeen when it came to Bren, those eyes staring him down as if he could kill him on looks alone.

The jealousy all but dripped off the other man, making the drow even less unbecoming then he actually was, but Essek paid little mind-- instead coddling his Pet, a possessive hand laid on Bren's thigh or a lean in to whisper a command into his ear. Such murmurings as to make the other man preen underneath it all-- and all the while Adeen seethed and inwardly plotted. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren did not speak to Adeen again. The exchange they had at the door to the bedroom on that night was more than enough. He had said his peace and had little else to communicate to the man. He did watch him though, to make certain that there would be no petty retribution towards Essek. The former Volstrucker would not abide any harm coming to his master.

He soaked up the attention and affection though, ignoring the way Adeen's gaze tried to spear him through and instead fixing the usual adoring gazes at his Master. And preen he did, downright glowing at the attention, at the gentle touches. Take that, Adeen.

Perhaps he should have known better that danger was close.]

[zauberdecke]

[ After a week, Essek and Bren's sexual intimacies resumed; no where near as profuse but still rather vigorous all told. So there was a brief period of calm and bliss between them where they fell back into the routine that had existed in the days before Essek's heat. It was one such day a month later where Bren had been left at home while Essek attended matters at the Lucid Bastion.

The Shadowhand had wanted to stay home because he'd woken up unexpectedly tired, but he knew that after his week long vacation there had been no way he could've called out again.

Though part of it was blamed on the fact that the night before, himself and Adeen had a rather large argument about Essek's refusal to share his bed; that had not gone well but Essek had held his own before finally heading back to his room to be soothed by his pet. Surely he was tired because of that, and no other reason.

So that was when Bren was left alone for the afternoon; though promptly at one o'clock there would be a repast sent up, much like the Unseen Servants always brought him, a wonderfully decadent meat pie stuffed with vegetables and over it spread a pastry crust, the sort of food that was comfortable and would remind him of the home that he'd described to Essek in great detail. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren had noticed the fact that his Master seemed tired when he'd left, but he too had assumed it was probably the stress of that confrontation the night before. He'd been happy to welcome Essek back into his arms and to try to soothe away the encounter with the sort of casual, gentle touches that had been come to be commonplace between them.

He'd only pouted briefly when Essek left, wishing that of all days he could accompany his Master. But he knew the Shadowhand's business was important, so he was a good and dutiful pet who settled in to pass a quiet day until the other man returned to him.

When lunch arrived, he of course ate -- both because it was indeed the sort of familiar comfort food that reminded him of a home so far away and long ago and because he did not want to be scolded for disobedience. It was a normal enough day.

Until it wasn't.

Not long after he'd eaten, after the unseen servants had cleared away the dishes, Bren started feeling wrong.

Cold.

It began slowly, a creeping sort of nausea and malaise that felt like it was draining the warmth straight out of him. By the time Essek made it home, Bren was in a very bad state, curled up and wrapped in a blanket and shivering, deathly pale, lips nearly blue.]

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek came home a little later than normal, as the meeting with the Bright Queen had run a little bit late. The door opened and then he was throwing off his cloak for the Unseen Servants to take, when he saw that Bren was curled up on the bed with blankets. He wandered over to drop a kiss on the top of the forehead when he noticed the shivering, and then he pressed his hand to Bren's forehead.

Cold.

Clammy.

He sat down on the edge of the bed and said quietly, surveying the other man with a eye that was practiced and careful. ] You do not.. are you sick? [ Confusion of course, he did not know how humans experienced sickness, he knew that it was rare for drow to get sick. He attempted to brush some locks of hair off from Bren's forehead in the process. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren startled at the touch. Blue eyes snapped open, taking a long moment to focus. He was shaking, and as he turned his head to look up at him. His lips were blue, and he looked more like a man being frozen to death actively than ill. When he exhaled, his breath was visible in the room. Whatever was happening, it had the aura of something undeniably arcane about it.

The poison that Adeen had chosen was a slow one, chosen perhaps for that element of suffering, to make sure that the end was not a peaceful or easy one. Or a quick one.

It took Bren a moment to realize he'd been asked a question. He shook his head slightly.]

I do not know...

[zauberdecke]

[ There was something decidedly wrong and the moment that Bren looked up with unfocused eyes to stare at him, Essek knew-- could see it in the blue-cold lips and the skin that was so pale that it retained no warmth. His heart went as cold as his Pet looked and then he started.

His hand went reflexively to his stomach, a subconscious gesture. ] You need a healer, I will have one sent for immediately.

[ The drow did not want to leave Bren though so he crawled underneath the covers, and lamented the fact that body was not a furnace. ] Hold on to me, Bren-- maybe I can make you warmer love.

[ He called out a command in Undercommon which was promptly followed. ] When did you start feeling like this? [ Essek wanted to determine what it was because he was a problem solver. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[A healer was probably a good idea. Essek was here now. It was comfort, just the presence of his Master. It washed over him, softer than the cold, and he curled into Essek. His Master calling him by his name caught his attention too, the note of worry in the drow's voice.

He didn't want to worry him.

But something was wrong, and he knew it. He was not a stupid man, and he could feel himself slipping away.]

This... this afternoon. [A frown, and a soft whimper he tried to stifle back.] After lunch.

[zauberdecke]

[ Oh, how Essek worried especially when Bren was so very cold; and he wished desperately for the healer to get here now, in fact the healer needed to be here five minutes ago as far as the drow was concerned. He shifted so that he could wrap his arms tightly around him, as if the gravity of his embrace could stop the shivers from going out of control.

His mind thought of just before lunch, but he found it hard to focus because of Bren right here and now-- his mind wanted to focus on the other man, his Mate. Inside him surged an almost violent protective streak as he held the Empire Man close. ] Bren, you cannot close your eyes-- keep looking at me alright?

[ Essek was also not stupid and the tone of Bren had shifted, that fire of warmth gone, estinguished and he felt the world grow colder; damn it he could not warm him? How could he warm him when he was not a creature of flames? A nearly potent twist of desperation settled in his stomach while he held him, he buried his lips in hair and it was instinctually intimate. ]

The healer will he here soon, Bren? What will make you warmer? Should I have a fire lit? [ If Essek could've lit himself on fire to provide that vital warmth, he would've-- and gladly ]

[ausgebrannt]

Yes, Master...

[A soft mumble of the words, even as he tried to force his lips to form the sounds. The shivering was not abating but there was comfort in those arms wrapped so securely around him.]

I will try.

[Gods would he try. He found with a sort of startled surprise that he genuinely wanted to live, did not want to die and leave Essek. Not here and not now and not like this. He'd half wished for death after what he'd done to his family, had been certain he did not deserve each breath he took. But oh he wanted to stay.

It just didn't seem like that was going to happen.]

I do not think a fire will help.

[A trembling hand with ice cold fingers reached up to brush along Essek's cheek.]

Just stay close? I do not want to be alone when I... [A pause and he added, quieter.] I do not want to be alone.

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek heard what Bren did not say, and that was the most heartrending thing in the world, he could feel the tears start the moment the cold translated into a brush against his skin-- and the look in those eyes.

Desperation seized him, wild and unbidden as his fingers caught his Pets. ] I command you to keep your eyes open, you would not dare, you would not dare leave me--

[ Punishment, he could not punish him for this-- instead his own heart would bear that and he would be left to clean up the mess of it as it shattered. If he could not hold him any tighter, he tried anyways. ] You are M'hrandii, my mate-- you cannot...

[ Tears started and they would not stop, a soft sprinkling as he continued. ] I love you... you have to hold on for me, please. A healer will be here soon.

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren could feel a sharp pang in his chest where his slowing heart ached at the sight of those tears. He would have brushed them away with icy fingertips, but then his hand was caught up in Essek's and he curled his own fingers through the drow's, holding with as much strength as he could muster.

Bluish lips twitched into an attempt at a smile, though it didn't entirely make it into those eyes, blue eyes that seemed to be gazing farther into the distance with each shaking breath. A silent sob at those words, and tears rose and fell, but they turned to trails of ice, like frost spreading over glass windows on a winter morning.]

I do not want to leave you...I do not want to...

[He did not want to let go, but he knew his body was succumbing to whatever had a hold of him, whatever had been done to him.]

I want to stay with you. Always.. I want... I love you too, so much... I love...

[Silence stole the rest of the words from his lips, no breath left in his lungs to bear them out into the wider world. He went still, too still, no breath, heart frozen in between beats. His eyes stared off into something beyond this world, open and unblinking, the last of the light gone out of them.]

[zauberdecke]

[ In slow motion he watched the only man he had ever cared about draw his last breath, and his heart seized a sort of panic that threatened to tsunami through him. His fingers tightened and he brought the man close to him, the cold body, the frozen man which he buried his face in those locks of hair as rough and absolutely desolate sobs rolled through him.

No, this could not be-- his Mate-- what would he do without his mate? He could not, not after just figuring out that they were mates. A drow's lifespan was long, and two months was but a drop in the bucket-- too soon.

His fingers curled tightly into unfeeling skin and he sat there and whimpered, a harsh flurry of sobs as he held on and wouldn't let go. He was there thirty minutes when the healer came, and when she entered-- he looked up sharply, frozen tears upon his cheek as he growled. ]

Fix him, make him better.

[ The healer looked to the rigid man in the Shadowhands arms and and said with a trembling breath. ] ~It is against the laws of the Luxon, it is forbidden to resurrect an Outlander~

[ The growl grew even more intense. ]

Bring him back, or I swear to whatever gods above that I will destroy the world and everything in it, I command it as Shadowhand of the Bright Queen.

[ The Healer still seemed hesitant to which point Essek placed his free hand on his stomach and continued on. ] I will take responsibility for it, you were clearly coerced.

[ For a moment the Healer looked to Essek's stomach, as if considering and then she stepped forward and said quietly. ] ~I will ressurect him... if anyone were to suspect..~

I will keep my word--

~Please step back then-- [ And so Essek did, reluctantly letting go so that the Healer could start her ritual. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren slipped into darkness, into cold, but the last thing he knew, the last thought in his mind was that he was in Essek's arms, and it was unfair that he had to leave them. He didn't want to go. His Master looked so sad...

Eventually cold faded to nothing.

Beyond eventually the nothingness gave way to the start of something warm, a soft light, a gentle crepuscular glow. Then the sound of someone humming, light and quiet and familiar. Bren's eyes opened and he found himself looking at a face he had not seen since he was a boy. Una Ermendrud smiled and pulled Bren into her arms.]

Oh Bren. You're here too soon, little spark.

[Bren heard himself sob, wrapping his arms around her and clinging tightly.] Mother... Mother I'm so sorry, I... I missed you... I didn't mean...

[A soft shushing sound and Bren found himself being urger closer.] Shh... it's all right. We've missed you too. Our darling boy. You've grown up so much. Look at you. But now isn't the right time. You have so much more to do. So much more to be.

[Bren started to shake his head. He knew he was dead. He remembered. But he remembered Essek too, remembered the pain on his Master's face, remembered the ache of hearing those words. He... gods help him he didn't want to leave him.] I can't...

I know. He needs you. And you need him. [And her granddaughter would need both of them. Another smile and his mother pressed a kiss to his forehead.] Listen. He's calling.

[A faintly confused furrow of his brow, but there it was. Through the stillness and silence. A voice. A pull, the tether between him and the world of the living not quite severed entirely. Not yet.]

[zauberdecke]

[ The ritual was the Healer calling upon the Light of the Luxon, a swirling mass. Essek who did not believe in gods, did not believe in the Luxon understood that there was a power, but he was not precisely certain that it was the gods that spoke, he watched with one hand over his stomach protectively and without knowing.

A swirl of light wrapped around the other man and he watched with baited breath.

A thaw started as the burning light engulfed and swirled around Bren, starting at the heart, a thawing of heat and light that rippled outwards to fall backwards toward limbs and ever outward, placing a trail of heat to slowly unfrost the man and to strengthen the tether and to cement it. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[The scene around him began to fade, and for a moment he looked at his mother frantically. He had so much left to say, but he knew he had to go back. He wanted to go back, to see those tears dried from his Master's -- his mate's -- eyes. Una seemed to know, embracing her son one last, lingering moment before releasing him.]

Go. Little spark. Be happy.

[Darkness found him again, but it was kinder this time, and he woke once more to warmth, a spring thaw that slowly dissipated the ice. Skin gone cold and pale and tinged with blue began to warm, a slow flush taking the place of the deathly cold. He fell back into himself, and lips parted around a gasp of breath before blue eyes opened in bleary confusion, like rising from the middle of a vivid dream.]

[zauberdecke]

[ The moment that Bren drew his very first breath, Essek felt his entire heart settle back in his body; he could not help the mere frantic way that he scrambled to Bren's side, his body falling against his pet as he wrapped his arms around those shoulders and then buried his face in that neck.

A rough sob that felt like a cataclysm as he wrapped around the other man as tightly as would allow. His hands moving to stroke through locks of red hair and his own whispered sobs over and over. ] Love you, love you.. love you.

[ It was a litany, a desperate litany as he endeavored to hold on and never let go; he felt glowing like a star shower and his heart full of possibility. ]

[ The Healer stood back to watch this reunion. ] ~The child within you will grow with both mother and father~

[ausgebrannt]

[The world came back into view, and the Zemnian wizard focused on the only part of it that mattered. Essek was there and those arms were around him, and his second breath was full of his Master's familiar scent, and his arms moved to clutch at him, to shut his eyes and turn to bury his face against the side of Essek's head.

Alive. And those fingers were in his hair and those sweet words were falling with those sobs into his shoulder. His arms tightened around him, murmuring softly.]

I am here. I have you. It is all right. My love...

[When the healer spoke, Bren looked up startled. The words drawing a flicker of confusion in his eyes.]

The... child?

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek barely noticed it, of course he did not. He was too busy soaking in the feeling of Bren within his arms, his lover-- his dearest warm heart, who was now once again vital and filled with the light of fires within him. His forehead resting against the other man's temples as he had already crawled onto that lap.

The Shadowhand did not notice those words from the Healer, because the one important person was right here, though at the question-- he looked up in confusion as well. ] Child?

[ The Healer smiled, albeit a bit enigmatically. ] ~The child, created of your mating. It is after all not uncommon for a male to bare child once they find their Mate, if they find their mate. It is rare, but not unheard of.~

[ Essek's jaw dropped only a little bit as he fell forward into Bren's arms, and then this time his hand went to his abdomen despite itself-- but now knowingly. ]

~I noticed it when you wrapped your arm protectively about it when I entered the room, that is instinctual-- you wish to protect your child just as you wish to protect your Mate.~

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren's eyes went wide as if the world had decided to flip itself on its axis, up turning swiftly to down and down to up and he clung all the tighter to Essek, shifting as if he could enfold the other man more fully into his embrace.

The child, created of your mating.

Essek was going to have a baby? Essek was going to have his baby? His heart hammered its way against his ribcage in a desperate beating.]

We are... having a baby...

[Give him a moment to try to wrap his mind around this being real. A baby. A child. His mate. A... a family? The tears started rising in his eyes and he blinked them back as best he could, but they kept rising, eventually falling.] My love.

[zauberdecke]

You shall have enough gold for three resurrections, I shall see it so.

[ One for his mate, one for him and one for the child that right now settled like a seed. And now that he knew it was there, he could feel it like a small little flutter, a thoroughly unplanned but no less wanted little seed that now was growing within him.

He had never thought of such a thing.

Into his Mate's arms he settled while he rested his nose against that jawline. ] Well, I cannot think of anyone else who would've had the opportunity within the last month-- it must be you that is the father, it can only be you.

[ Adeen was not his M'hrandii but he knew that this man was. ]

~Thank you, Shadowhand-- I will leave you now, though I will visit you if you will allow, to make sure that all is going according to plan.~

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren would love any child that was Essek's, even if he had not been the father. But to know that it was him, that this was something they had created together -- an unintentional but no less miraculous for that bit of magic that was so much greater than any spell he had ever crafted before.

His hands moved in soothing, simple touches over Essek, needing to feel him, however he could, to ground himself back to this world. This life. He turned his gaze to the healer with a grateful smile.]

Thank you.

[His mind was still swimming. A child.]

[zauberdecke]

[ Once the Healer had left, the door shut behind-- Essek put up the ward in place so that no one could enter. And then he wrapped his arms and buried his face in that neck, to breath him in. Against his own chest, he could hear the steady breathing of his lover, the sweetness of life that was now Bren's-- he cherished each precious rise and fall.

His only wish was to hold him close. ] I lost you, I lost you and then you came back.

[ He would not talk about the fact that it was forbidden, it was not something that Bren had to understand the severity of except for. ] Tell no one of this, they do not need to know that you were ressurected-- though you were very sick and the Healer was able to get to you in time.

[ His fingertip sent to Bren's mouth to rest the digit against those lips. ]