Baby, it's cold outsid

[ausgebrannt]

[It was Caleb's first Winter's Crest in Rexxentrum, in the small cottage that he had taken to calling home now that the Nein had taken a step back from the more intense part of their adventuring. Lucien and Cognouza were dealt with. Trent Ikithon was imprisoned. The war between the Dynasty and the Empire ended. Jobs well done, he supposed.

He had Essek had plans to travel back to Aeor, to seek out the T-Dock and the other mysteries of magic that lingered there, but the trip had not yet been undertaken. After all, Caleb knew that the drow had to be careful. The eyes of the Dynasty and the Bright Queen would eventually fall on him in regards to the stolen beacon. But that didn't mean he didn't look forward to the evenings that Essek managed to drop by to spend time.

He treasured those times, when they'd discuss magic and theory. He'd make tea -- or sometimes break out something a bit stronger -- and they'd talk until all hours.

All that talking but some thing still remained unsaid, unspoken, and lingering on the tip of Caleb's tongue where he could taste the bittersweetness of it, of a longing and a desire that he genuinely believed he did not truly deserve to ever really satisfy. How could he? He was a tainted thing, hands still blood-covered, despite his continued attempts to atone.

But he was still too selfish not to want.

Tonight he was seated in his chair, glancing at the door with an undisguised anxious hope. It had been a while since Essek had come, and Caleb missed him. And with Winter's Crest upon them, well, he wanted to share that with the drow, to show him the traditions he had grown up with.]

Comments

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek heard the words, including the rather foreign 'Schatz' which he would have to look up later-- if he remembered. He looked down at Caleb, fixing the other man with a very stern look from above even as he methodically started to line the tree with the little baubles. ] You will turn my head if you are not careful-- did we not have a conversation about the egocentricity of wizards?

[ They had but it had stemmed toward mental egoism, not the others including that which stemmed toward looks. He was not vain by a long shot, in fact his own rigorous insistant to take care of himself was because he felt like he had something to prove and wanted to be taken seriously, not that he was actually vain.

He floated down then to just beside Caleb, his footsteps light so that nary anyone would feel it, as if he was alighting from the heavens. ] I wish I had something to share with you of similar, but unfortunately I do not. The holiday of the Luxon is not really a holiday but rather a day full of prayers for your future life, a truly alienating concept. [ He was was hanging more ornaments but at a slower rate ] I find this far preferrable, and the company is very pleasant.

[ausgebrannt]

We did. And yet, perhaps I will risk it, in this case.

[What wouldn't he risk to turn Essek's head? Except the answer to that was their friendship. It meant so much to him, after all, what they had created between them. He had no right to ask for more. He did not deserve more.

But he still looked at Essek as if the drow was indeed some angel who had just alit upon the ground.]

Perhaps in trade you can tell me more about you, ja? You have mentioned a brother, before, I believe.

[zauberdecke]

[ He kept himself on the ground and decided to hang these ones up a little bit closer. He worked deftly as he considered the question. ] I do have a brother by the name of Verin, he is stationed in Bazzoxan where he is the Taskhand that oversees the military.

[ He stood back to quietly assess that the ornaments were spaced evenly a part. ] When we were children, he was always tagging after me, drawing in my books, always climbing things, could never sit still-- and I was the complete opposite, where that I managed to sit quietly and be quite good.

[ A delicate laugh at the memory ] We argued like cats and dogs many a time, and drove the Umavi, our mother, quite incensed at our bickering... but I will miss him, I think.

[ A bit wistfully ] He was the only member of my family whom I think I loved.

[ausgebrannt]

[Caleb has stopped his decorating to watch Essek, watching those careful and precise hands set the ornaments in the branches, as he spoke about his childhood. The Zemnian wizard found himself imagining a smaller still-serious-and-studious version of Essek being tormented by his more active and mischievous little brother. It was a cute vision.]

I think bickering is natural even among close siblings, ja?

[That was the impression that he had of it, even if he'd not had any brothers or sisters.]

Surely you can still find ways to see him? If I am able to help... he is always welcome here in Rexxentrum if he ever desires to sight see in the Empire.

[zauberdecke]

I would not want to endanger him, it would be difficult to do so right at this moment. I would imagine that if he was caught consorting with an enemy of the Dynasty, he would be severely punished, and he is a very good man, he is not like me.

[ Essek said this quietly before he stepped back from the tree. ] So I do not want that for him, I would like him to live his life and live free-- or as free as one may while still living under the strictures of the Luxon.

[ And then Essek lifted his hands to make a shrugging motion. ] I did not mean to bring, as Jester would say, the 'vibe' down. This is supposed to be a happy celebration, yes?

[ausgebrannt]

[Oh see now there went Caleb's heart. He knew that feeling, the weight of knowing the mistakes and sins that one carried on their shoulders. But Essek's own sins were ones he had seen the Shadowhand try to atone for, try to be better than.

He stepped in closer to the drow then, to set a hand against his shoulder, along the fabric of the gifted scarf the other wizard was still wearing.]

You are a good man too, Essek. I have seen you, becoming better than your mistakes.

[The way he was ready to give his brother up rather than chance bringing trouble to him, that was all the more evidence, wasn't it? Caleb knew he was biased, yes, but he didn't think that meant he was wrong. Not about this.]

You have done nothing of the sort. The 'vibes' are still perfect, I...

[This was when a soft little jingling of bells above their heads drew Caleb's attention up, in time to see one of the tower's cast finishing hanging a sprig of mistletoe (and accompanying silvered bells) directly above the two wizards.]

Scheiße. Traitorous beasties. [Muttered under his breath.]

[zauberdecke]

[ It was rather kind of Caleb to comfort him like this except he was being practical about this, about the situation with his brother. There was sentimentality within him, he would never be able to look at a jar of jam without thinking of his brother, he would always see that doofy smile on his face, but also the kindness there and the way that he cared for his people enough to want to protect them.

Right now it was better if he kept away. He could survive, they rarely saw each other anyways and perhaps one day who knows. Just not today.

He had been about to say something, to tell Caleb that he was prepared to go back to decorating the tree, when he heard the same thing as Caleb did, he looked up to see the cats were finishing their own decorations. ] Are those bells? How clever of them.

[ He did not know the meaning of Mistletoe nor precisely what it entailed; but he was smiling once again, the wistfulness of the past giving way to the present where he was firmly in the center of with Caleb. He missed his brother yes, but there was Caleb right here. ] Are they not supposed to decorate?

[ausgebrannt]

They are bells. It seems they wished to be noticed.

[Traitors! If a fairy cat had ever looked smug, it absolutely did in this moment. Because clearly, the wizard who had summoned this tower and them -- their wizard -- desperately needed help or else he'd die of old age still pining over the Shadowhand, who clearly was pining in return.

Caleb looked form the sprig of mistletoe back to Essek, the start of a flush turning the pale skin beneath freckles a soft pink.]

Ah... no. They are allowed to decorate as they wish. But this is... it is another tradition. That plant is mistletoe. It is hung in various places, and those who are caught standing beneath it are meant to kiss. [More blushing.] It is a frivolous, silly custom really.

[zauberdecke]

[ Traitorous fairy cat, very good fairy cat.

The mistletoe hung there dangling on little silver bells while paws lightly batted them, likely to draw attention to the incriminating piece of merry greenery to laud the coming season. He watched the plant with entirely too much interest, he also clocked the blush as well as the way that Caleb clearly seemed flustered, perhaps even a bit uncomfortable.

Essek would not mind kissing Caleb but... he noticed that bit of discomfort and he did not want Caleb to do anything he did not want to, even if the thought of kissing the other wizard warmed his heart. ] Is this is not something you wish to do?

[ He was trying to be considerate of the other man, giving him care and consideration as well as respecting his boundaries. ] I would kiss you but ah, I do not want to make you uncomfortable.

[ausgebrannt]

[Uncomfortable yes, but likely not for the reasons that Essek might be imagining. And for a moment Caleb was unsure how to answer. But he could not just lie to the drow. That didn't feel right either.

And those words I would kiss you threaten to stir in him the kind of hope that led to boldness he didn't often manage. A breath and he shook his head.]

It is... not a matter of not wishing to.

[Breathe, Caleb. Remember to breathe.] But the exact opposite. I wish to kiss you entirely too much, more than I have any right to want.

[The secret was loosed into the air and Caleb braced himself for how it would land.]

[zauberdecke]

Oh?

[ He hoped that the cats would hold that thought with the mistletoe and bells for he hoped to come back to that. But he was focusing on words and revealed secrets, on the disarming flush and the note of chagrin; how recalitrant the man look, like he'd been caught with his fingers in the cookie jar. His heart understood that Caleb wanted to kiss him, and wasn't that a curious thing indeed.

A hum even as he very softly tucked a lock of hair behind Caleb's ear, already a gesture that was far too intimate but not one that he cared go follow.

He did not speak, rather he leaned upward and then brushed his lips very softly against the corner of Caleb's mouth, then he whispered ]

I have wanted to kiss you since the Grove-- ever since you choose to prioritize my well-being over that of your previous...

[ Associates, lovers, there were perhaps so many words for them. ] Unfortunately it is easy to act in battle than it is in peace.

[ausgebrannt]

[Caleb's eyes widened at the gentle touch, the way his hair was tucked back, eyes finding Essek's face. There was that hope again, wild and willful thing that it was, springing up in his chest, exploding when Essek leaned close, when those lips brushed so very close to his own.

Oh.

That was. That was some miraculous thing, wasn't it? That Essek wanted to kiss him too? That Essek... felt the same?

Caleb's voice barely managed to be a whisper, as quickly as his breath felt like it was rushing from his lungs,]

I... I will always choose you, Essek. My heart made its choice, and I am powerless to change it. And I do not wish to. But I do wish to kiss you, very very much. May I kiss you?

[zauberdecke]

Far be it for me to get in the way of tradition.

[ Essek said this with the faintest level of coy to his voice, as within proximity as his mouth was to Caleb's, he could feel the puffed wishes against his lips, the inquiry and the sweet ask of the other wizard, and he knew that he wanted to kiss this man too-- had wanted to kiss him and see where it would take them. That Caleb wanted to kiss him was an intoxicating thought and one that he was not going to resist.

Even if there was questions at the back of his mind if it would change the easy serenity and friendship that they had managed to take for themselves. He still wanted Caleb as a friend but.. perhaps he was too selfish to want both? That was perhaps for another discussion and another time. ] That being said, my lips are right here Caleb Widogast-- you may kiss me.

[ausgebrannt]

[Caleb wanted it all too, greedy thing as he was. Maybe it was hubris -- gods knew he was talented at hubris -- but he thought they could do it, that they could somehow exist as something more without losing what they were.

So the permission, and the proximity of those lips that he had dreamed of, was all it took. Caleb tilted his chin just that small amount so that he could capture Essek's lips with his own, could kiss him like he had in so many guilty fantasies, though that ache of yearning that usually accompanied the imaginings was deeper and sweeter somehow.

Above their head the mistletoe and its little bells was jingled by a little paw in celebration.]

[zauberdecke]

[ The kiss, this kiss. He'd not allowed himself guilty fantasies, he had not wanted to give himself hope to wish or dream. It was the practicality within himself that had prevented him from such things but now he was here, the lips touched his own and the sweet pliancy, the softest indentations of mouth to mouth, the briefest whisper of tongue, all of the things that perhaps he would be repulsed by under any other situation but which.. because of the bond that they shared, he was suddenly quite eager for.

Slow to let go, those mouths were a life of their own-- nose to nose and then his arm wraps around Caleb's shoulders, and he looks breathless, feels it too. ]

That was very nice.... I like your traditions very much.

[ And then he manages to say this seriously. ]

Is there more mistletoe around?

[ausgebrannt]

Yes... ja. Traditions are wonderful things.

[Caleb sounded more than a little distracted, as if that kiss had derailed his train of thought entirely and he had to right it before he could manage to handle actual words. Kissing Essek felt like discovering the arcane for the first time, magic and impossible and something that would intrigue him for the rest of his days.

And even as that kiss break, Caleb made no move to draw away, to move anywhere out of the circle of those arms.]

Oh... oh ja there is so much of it. An infestation of mistletoe. The tower is crawling with it.

[zauberdecke]

Would you mind showing me.. every single one of them?

[ He was asking in his own beautifully articulate way, that he wanted to be kissed. Of course first under the aegis of the mistletoe and then they could take the mistletraining wheels off and move on to unassisted kisses.

Mainly, that he wanted to be kissed by Caleb. ]

Though I know we still have to finish decorating the tree so if there is no time then I could wait until there was time.

[ausgebrannt]

I would be very pleased to give you the full mistletoe tour, Liebling.

[Caleb lifted a hand, fingertips tracing gently along the drow's lower lip. Gods he'd had one taste of those lips and already he was craving more. Mistletoe indeed. There would probably always be sprigs of it in the tower now, each and every time he cast it from this day onward.

A pause and he glanced over the tree.]

Ah... right, the tree. Perhaps we should finish first before we are... entirely distraced.

[zauberdecke]

Very good...

[ Essek was pleased even as he very artfully stepped out of the arms though not without the touch of his fingers against forearm; he was already picking up ornaments and doing what he'd been doing previously though there was the awareness that something had changed between them, it was like a scion of rightness had clicked into place and he did not know what it meant but it had to be something good right.

And he kept thinking of more of those kisses, perhaps a reward for decorating the tree. They could find another sprig of mistletoe and kiss underneath it; he suddenly had such an appreciation for greenary. ]

You mentioned something about a star at the top? [ Essek said, trying to be completely chill about the whole kissing thing, even though his heart was beating a mile a minute. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Something had shifted, a change in the gravity between them, that had already set them orbiting one another. Caleb watched Essek a long moment before remembering himself and getting back to his own decorating of the tree. His heart was a mess of racing and skipped beats inside his chest, beating with a renewed hope that he had not allowed himself to really feel before their lips met for the first time.

Right yes. It is the final touch. We cannot forget that.

[He lifted the tree topper then, a simple golden star that glowed with an obviously arcane energy, and a perhaps familiar amber glow, reminiscent of the dancing lights that Caleb so favored. He stood then, holding it out to Essek.]

You will do the honors, ja?

[zauberdecke]

[ Inordinately pleased with the kiss, still in wonder of it even as they both decorated the tree in companionable silence, he suddenly saw the mistletoe everywhere, in every little corner. Aware of it, and the memory of lips upon his. Essek was careful with the decorating while the lights started to shine on the tree. It looked beautiful and cozy, he thought that this was a tradition he would've liked as a child, but he was being shared with by Caleb-- better late than never.

He floated down and then took the star with both his hands, the way that it illuminated the two of them. A glance toward Caleb, impossible softness there and then with his hand underneath it he started to rise, ascending to the very top and then he placed it at the peak and made sure to affix it securely, using a frisson of gravity.

Then he descended, his eyes catching sight of a little sprig of mistletoe, a wave of his hand-- that too was discreet, bringing it to align over the two of them; it floated with magic-- would slip over them just as Essek reached the ground right in front of them. To steady himself, the drow's hand came to rest on Caleb's shoulders just before he was to touch down, and a laugh sweetly fell from his lips. ]

It looks beautiful--

[ Essek's eyes slid upward, watching the mistletoe mysteriously float just over their heads. ] It appears that.. there is a mistletoe there.

[ The drow was not being too subtle, it was clear by the way that it was floating that the dark elf put it there with only one purpose in mind, to kiss Caleb. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Caleb watched in a soft wash of awe as Essek placed the star atop the tree, the gentle light of it mingling with the other lights scattered throughout the tree's branches. It was lovely, dreamlike in a way, and what a dream to stand there with Essek with the taste of the other wizard still on his lips and preoccupying his thoughts.

He turned to face him as the drow alighted back to earth beside him. And his eyes were very much fixed on Essek as he agreed,]

Ja. Very beautiful.

[But oh? More mistletoe. Caleb followed that gaze upward. How strange and inexplicable, floating mistletoe. The Dunamancer was not being subtle, but Caleb was a fan.]

It appears you are correct. It seems we're bound by tradition again...

[Oh woe. Tragic. He lifted a hand to cup lightly at Essek's cheek. Kissing?]

[zauberdecke]

Hmmmmhmmm.. it would be a shame to flout tradition.

[ Says the Dunamancer who had been doing everything to flout the traditions within the Dynasty to the point where he was willing to commit high-level treason against them. But that wasn't mistletoe, and it wasn't Caleb Widogast who was standing there before him, cupping his cheek lightly.

He leaned in to that hand that cupped his cheek, tilting to press a kiss to that palm; which did not count for a mistletoe kiss, it was almost like a cat who was rubbing up against someone to scent mark them. Then he stood on his tiptoes and brushed his lips against Caleb's once again, finding that the Transmuter's lips were highly addictive, the brush of facial hair against his chin, all of these things which made the other man perfect for him.

How had he ever thought that kissing was inconvenient and troublesome? Especially when Caleb's mouth was so warm and inviting, and tasted like spiced wine. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Caleb had never loved tradition more than he did in this moment, as Essek's lips found his once more. He was quickly realizing that he could all too easily lose himself in kissing the other wizard, and he was all too happy to do exactly that. There was still that voice at the back of his mind that insisted he did not deserve this, that he was too stained by his sins.

But even that voice found itself drowned out by the sheer rush of feeling and thrill of Essek's lips on his own.

His hands found their way to settle against the other man's hips, holding gently. This time he let the kiss linger as long as Essek would allow, a tilt of his chin to slot their lips together more completely.]

[zauberdecke]

[ He wanted to linger in the circle of Caleb's arms, feeling those lips press down upon his own-- the soft indent of tongue against lips, slowly and carefully seeking it out-- his hands cupping that cheek then, feeling scratchy beard against his fingertips before he slipped just underneath ear to bury in the locks of hair there.

If there was only one way for Essek to go, it was this way. It was like if they had been destined to be together, meant in this moment and then he leaned his forehead against Caleb's while the hair teased and tempted his fingertips in a way that was almost sinful. ] You are enjoyable to kiss.. I-- [ A flush filled his cheeks and then another kiss, this one more seeking than the last, wanting this upending of gravity to continue going. ]

How am I ever going to recover from this, Caleb Widogast?

[ How was he to go back to something before this? ]