"Broken Shards"

[zauberdecke]

"In the dark
I need to taste the blood
Go on, draw another line
We can cross this time."
- Blindfold by Sleeping Wolf

---



[ Essek Thelyss: Shadowhand to the Dynasty.

One who reached further then the Luxon would allow, who would do absolutely anything for knowledge. Oh no, the man did not care for power, not really. He wanted to cast himself into the portal of knowing, he wanted to surrender himself to books and learning without having to deal with the mundanities of socio-politics that all of the Kryn engaged in. It was tedious and it filled him with sickness even as he plastered on an urbane smile for all and sundry to see.

Within the Dynasty, it was customary to take pets of the Empire; they were brought in across the border of Asarius, across the mountains and into the Dynasty. There were Dynasty born pets on the other side, both lost to the ravages of the other's civilization, generally never to be seen again.

Essek had never really had an interest to begin with when it came to pets; at the market he carefully avoided the slave blocks where those not of the Dynasty were paraded around. However, it had come to this-- it had come to his trading of the Beacon, and in return he recieved a Volstrucker to serve him. And yet, for all of that, Essek Thelyss had not thought he would receive a broken Volstrucker.

In fair trade, he and recieved a dossier on the man in question and had perused it with only a small semblance of annoyance while Trent Ikithon had assured him that a man like him could be rebuilt, the honeyed words of a silken snake which Essek recognized.

After all did not a predator recognize another predator? So now he held in his household a man whom had to be guarded carefully, though Essek was not cruel despite how he imagined Dynasty pets were treated, the cage that he had placed this Volstrucker named Bren within, well it was comfortable-- he'd seen pictures of Vergossen so he supposed it must be far better than that place. But he had not precisely interacted with him-- most of his unseen servants were given the walking of him, the care and maintenance of him.

Perhaps because he did not precisely know what to do with him, or what use he had for something broken. Though he arguably did not know what manner of broken the Volstrucker was, but after a week-- he decided perhaps it was time to summon him and see for himself; acertain what sort of work was cut out for him.

If this man was worth putting back together again.

So it was one evening, he had the Empire man summoned to his chambers. ]

Comments

[ausgebrannt]

[To be in the possession of his mind, his sanity, that was more autonomy than Bren had the luxury of for a decade. Essek's word that he would not try to force his way into his thoughts or manipulate his mind were the sort of relief that was still washing through him in waves even days after they had been uttered. Bren turned his attention to his coffee, sipping at it just tentatively enough to assure that it would not scald his mouth too badly before drinking half the cup in one go. Gods help him he was going to survive this day one way or another.

He hummed thoughtfully in response to Essek's explanation. It made sense yes, that Pets could be of whatever use their owners decided to make of them, decided that they were best suited for.]

Yes, Master.

[Obedient he could do, would in fact do to the fullest extent he could, despite his baser instincts tending to betray him. Another more sedate sip of the coffee and he looked from the cup back to the drow.]

I would be of use, however that may come about.

[Though it was not lost on him the way that Essek's expression changed at the mention of Adeen and his choices in using his own pet. Was that same revulsion what Essek thought of when his own filthy desires made themselves known? He did not want to consider that, would try to be better than that, for fear of disgusting the Shadowhand to the point here he might be discarded, despite Essek's mercy. Though that did not stop him from commenting, a frown tugging at his lips.]

I do not like your husband. He'd shadow all your light if he could... but I do not think he is anywhere near equal to that task.

[zauberdecke]

[ Those words reached Essek and he had to linger on them for a little bit, his brows furrowing as he looked at somewhere not Bren, and then he spoke and it was consideringly. ] Love matches are not unheard of in the Kryn, but usually does not accompany marriage, those are purely for political power and gain with the ultimate purpose to make a trajectory upward.

[ He clasped his fingers together then, lightly cracking those knuckles though it did not reverberate and perhaps that was only due to soft muscles and tendons from those immaculately shaped fingers, that prevented such. ] I am born of House Thelyss but I am not consecuted, he is consecuted but not born of Den Thelyss-- however his advantage was that he had been in Den Thelyss in a previous life which necessitated the need to bring him back into the house.

[ A shrug that lifted his shoulders, accompanied by a sigh of weariness ] Which is why I am his husband, it is not by any strong desire... my strong desires are of the more cerebral bent.

[ausgebrannt]

It is different where I am from. ...at least, it was different for my family. Mother and father loved each other very much. But my family name is not one that anyone would ever know or speak of. Not a house or a den or anyone we were just... we were a family. That was enough, ja? That should have been enough.

[Bren trailed off, shaking his head and turning his gaze back to what remained of his coffee. He tried to stuff that guilt back down before it overwhelmed him and swallowed him whole. But it never really subsided, it never really went away, always clawing at him from the inside out, burning him up like a slow motion immolation.]

You are a wizard, ja? That desire for knowledge is a strong pull. I know it very well. Or I used to.

[zauberdecke]

Yes, it is a strong pull-- it has been for over 100 years. [ Essek said this before finally he gathered up the rest of his plates, empty with but a few crumbs and then he effortlessly floated it toward the little table near the door where the Unseen Servants would collect it and take it down for attending.

He was beginning to learn fondness, but there was still a ways to go before he understood truly what it would mean to truly love. But perhaps that would start with the surge of protectiveness that he felt when he looked into those sad blue eyes. ] I suspect that you will learn quite a bit about our customs before long, you pick up things quickly.. you are very clever, after all.

[ Another praise, perhaps timed because for a moment he caught the glimmer of a sadness there in those eyes and it was his way of attempting to assuage it so that it lost some of it's potency. ]

Shall we get ready for our walk then? And then a visit to my office? [ It would merely be a repeat of yesterday's routine, nothing truly special-- but the shine of being a new pet at the park would wear off a little bit more, and Bren would come underneath less scrutiny. ]

[ausgebrannt]

Elves...

[Bren murmured with a shake of his head. One hundred years. Of course, and looking like a man in the full flush of his youth and prime. Young for an elf, especially for a drow with such a high position of esteem as Shadowhand to the Bright Queen.]

Three times my age and unagingly beautiful.

[A flicker of a smile at the praise, and he looked to his master.]

Clever enough to get myself in trouble. That has proven to be true.

[It worked though, easing some of that melancholy for the moment, a little ripple of pleasure at the praise. He nodded.]

Of course, ja. I won't delay us.

[zauberdecke]

[ Oh no--

He certainly had not expected the flush to come to his cheeks at being called beautiful and yet there it was, so much that he had to get up from the bed, turn himself away toward his own wardrobe so that he could set out clothing for himself, and then for Bren as well. It was a good masking technique and allowed him to focus on something so that his cheeks may cool even sllightly.

Many called him beautiful and normally he could accept it with an incline of his head, they were fools and easily swayed by a pretty face.. easily manipulated too. But he could not quite say that about his Pet.

The two of them got ready for the day and it was true that one would have a far more tiring day the the other, it remained to be seen how Bren would evidence that tiredness and how it would factor into the interactions of the day. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren noticed that rise in color, the faint staining of lavender skin. For a moment he didn't know what he was witnessing, and even when Essek turned away and it occurred to Bren that his master was blushing, he didn't entirely understand why. Something he'd said?

He was still considering that as he dressed, made certain that he looked neat enough not to embarrass his master as they were seen out in public. While he'd never been one to concern himself about his appearance, he did take a moment to make certain that his hair was properly detangled.

And then out into the day. Bren did well, keeping up as if he weren't fighting with exhaustion the whole way. Right up until it finally caught up with him, probably at an inopportune time all said. In his master's office, kneeling at his feet while Essek conducted his business, he could feel himself start to drift.

Essek would know when he nodded off entirely, because his pet would tip into him, resting his head against his master's lap, exhaling a soft relieved sigh as he surrendered (albeit unwillingly) to exhaustion, to sleep.]

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek had been sitting at his desk, writing out his correspondences and wrapping up the very last of his duties before he focused on the dossier that he was writing for the Bright Queen, something he was to present to her eventually. When of course he felt the weight of a body, warm and langurous tipping against his thigh, and then the weight of a head with the cheek centered against sweet smelling lavender.

He paused within his writing and looked down for a long moment at the Pet who lingered there, could see the ginger lashes rest against the tops of freckled cheeks, the smooth peach hued skin which allayed the base of tone.

And a dark auburn lock curled against a cheek, all the way til it curled just downward upon jawline. For a moment Essek was caught up in the beauty and peace of the tableaux, there was a twitching within his fingertips as he endeavored not to touch, not wanting to wake the other man.

But ultimately? It was too large of a feat and his fingers found the soft hair at the forehead line and then he started to stroke gently, in a soothing back and forth motion-- he allowed himself this touch and cherished each little nuance of it, fragile and delicate that it was. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren had slipped to sleep quite suddenly, and deeply. Perhaps it was a testament to just how safe he felt that he was able to. The anxiety and fear that have tormented him, that still do flow through his veins thicker than his blood, but in this moment, his sleep was peaceful.

His eyes flutter faintly at the first brush of those fingers, but he did not stir to waking. Not yet. If anything, the few remaining furrows of his forehead smoothed at the touch, a soft sigh slipping past parted lips. This was not really the place to take a nap, was it?

A moment later and his eyes opened just enough to allow a sliver of sky blue to peek up at the drow from beneath ginger lashes. He was still mostly asleep, and a soft smile found his lips before his eyes fell shut again. Safe. Safe and basking in that soft, gentle touch.]

Sorry, Master. I'm... mm. I'm awake.

[He lied with another soft, sleepy sigh.]

[zauberdecke]

You do not need to worry about staying awake for me, you know that you could have stayed at my residence to sleep; you would not have disappointed. [ He murmured as he very casually twirled a lock of that fire-kissed hair around his fingertip, watching how it lightly curled in place-- he had this morning brushed Bren's hair until it had shone burnished in the light and had taken a distinct form of pleasure within that.

At that moment a secretary walked in to announce someone come to visit him however he raised his other hand, a single finger raised as if to silence the person, then a soft shooh'ing motion. The servant immediately left, likely to tell the visitor to come back later.

Honestly? None of Essek's mind was focused on that at the moment. ]

Surely there is somewhere comfortable than my leg however, I could make you a nice cot on the little chaise so that you can sleep. [ He couldn't know of course that would be unusual for a Pet Owner to offer, there were after all pallets and cots meant to hold the Pet's rest, and not actual furniture that was used by the Kryn. Not that would've mattered, it was probably unclear that Bren would even want to make the move from against leg to anywhere else. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren was drowsy enough that he did not notice the presence of the secretary in the room at first, but as Essek shooed them out, his eyes opened as if realizing. He half started to sit up straight, to try to act like he wasn't an utter sleepy disgrace of a pet, but when the secretary turned to leave and he realized that Essek had deliberately dismissed the servant, that his master was still playing with his hair.

So he saw no reason to actually go about moving, after all.

Bren had no idea about what was proper and not proper for a Pet either, after all, save for what Essek had told him. So the offer of the chaise was only met with a little shake of his head.]

No sense troubling over me. This is very comfortable.

[Especially with the hair petting. Gods he really was pathetically touch starved, Bren realized, but couldn't summon up the appropriate level of shame to accompany that thought as tired as he was. A thought did occur to him, and his eyes opened to gaze up at the Shadowhand.]

Unless I am in the way.

[zauberdecke]

If you were in the way, you simply would be dismissed-- like my secretary.

[ Essek said this as if it was the most natural thing in the world, his fingers sliding through fire locks without fear of being burned from them; it comforted him too in an almost wistful way-- how he could comb through those locks as if they were made of water, the soft light of the office catching highlights within. Ah, yes the hair had much improved since he'd been put into the personal keeping of him.

A hum as he considered.

A sound that likely Bren would grow used to, the precursor to thought.. that soft hum-sigh that denoted an exercise of thought. ]

Are you bored, Pet? Do you desire occupation of your own? [ Perhaps that would combat the sleepiness. ] If you are not then I have no strong desire that you exert yourself if you do not desire-- I do not consider you a trick Pet who must constantly amuse me, but I have to admit that I do enjoy your companionship.

[ausgebrannt]

Yes, Master.

[Bren expected that day would come before too long. He couldn't possibly hope to hold Essek's interest for all that long, could he? Not with what he was, at heart. But he would treasure the attention so long as Essek was generous enough to give it, before he eventually bored him or Essek saw the true brokenness in him, or worse tired of what a filthy, uncontrolled thing he was.

If self loathing were an Olympic sport -- and if Exandria had the Olympics -- Bren would take gold medal.

His eyes opened wider at the question of boredom. It was true he wasn't used to his mind being idle, well, okay, he quite literally had disappeared into catatonia for a decade, but not counting that.]

Occupation?

[But oh he was interested, intrigued even, by what Essek could mean by that?]

[zauberdecke]

[ The offer may have been nerd-in-nature, it was certainly highly innocent in the way that he meant it to be. Occupation of sorts, something to wile away the hours so that he did not get restless or even overtly sleepy. ] I meant, would you enjoy a book to read? I know that I did provide a Undercommon dictionary, but I could also give you a book to attempt to read through, that is if your mind wants for something to do.

[ His fingers slipped underneath that chin so that he could cheat Bren's face upward to the perfect tilt, so that Essek could look down into those luminously sad blue eyes. ]

If I were a pet such as myself, I would probably grow tired of sitting down for hours upon end and... [ the next words came carefully ] You have proven that your thoughts tend to turn on yourself when you are given too much time to think. Yes, I understand that you are sleep-filled right now but I do not think that a book would be so bad an idea.

[ausgebrannt]

[Well. That certainly did wake him up. Bren lifted his head, kneeling up straighter at the mention of a book. Clearly Essek had said something of the magic work in this instance.]

Ja. I would like that very much, a book to read. I enjoy reading very much.

[He was a huge book nerd, Essek, nearly salivating at the idea of something to sink his mental teeth into.

Then Essek called him out. Expertly. Bren could feel himself flushing with being perceived so clearly. And also with guilt which made it obvious that yes that was exactly what his thoughts were currently doing.]

[zauberdecke]

[ Like the beast in the tale that got the beauty to love him in parcel to the offer of a library, well Essek did not know that Bren was falling even deeper and deeper for him, but he did understand the lure of having something to read, to sink one's mental teeth into. There was the smoothest swipe of his hand, and then mage hand was moving to dance about his bookshelves until he picked out a single tome. Selected and then brought over until it rested right there on the little pillow at Bren's feet.

The cover was worn and obviously very well read, the leather smudged from handprints.

On the Title plate was the following written: Theories of Dunamatic Principle: An Introductory ]

You may read this, it does not have spells within it but it does contain the history of the School of Dunamancy, I am sure that there are tomes for all of the Schools but this happens to be a corebook, you could say.

[ausgebrannt]

[Oh Bren was falling, and being handed that book in particular sent the descent into utter freefall. How could he not? Even without containing actual spells, the idea of learning about this school of magic that was such a mystery where he had come from, it sent a thrill through him, that old and half-forgotten rush at the idea of knowledge, of learning and delving into the heart of the arcane itself.

He reached for the leatherbound volume, lifting it with an unmistakable sort of reverence for the knowledge it undoubtedly held.]

Ja, thank you. This is wonderful. Better than that... it is...

[He ducked his head.] I'm very grateful.

[zauberdecke]

This is a secret between us, it is generally frowned upon to allow outsiders to read such books.

[ Perhaps it was a sprig of rebelliousness blooming within his heart that tendered this, the knowledge that he was doing something that would be generally frowned upon, those silent ways that one suberted expectations, while conforming to it exactly on paper. ]

You are very clever, you have already proven this to me and you understand that any usage of this knowledge that is not sanctioned by myself will be summarily punished.

[ Though he did stroke the very side of that cheek, very softly. ]

Though if you wish to nap as well, I will not stop you-- at least this way you will not be bored while I am doing work at the office.

[ausgebrannt]

Of course. I will tell no one.

[Who did he have to tell anyway? It was not as if he had any interest in engaging Adeen or Adeen's pet in any sort of conversation, and he seldom seemed to cross paths with them save when Essek had no other choice for it. And Essek had not yet decided he needed a Pet Playdate or anything of that nature.

He ran his fingers along the soft leather, tracing the embossed letters that made up the title of the book. ...what Essek did not realize was that Bren would have this fully finished and memorized by the time they went home for the evening. But he would emphatically not be bored. And now that he had a book, sleep was a million miles from his mind.

That touch grounded him back to the moment, and he found himself leaning into it, nuzzling back at that hand with a rush of unconsidered and unguarded affection.]

I will not give you cause for being displeased with me. Not on purpose, at least.

[zauberdecke]

Very good, Chathtiu--

[ A few more strokes, affectionate and tender before finally Essek went back to his own correspondance. Within minutes there would be the opening of a door and then the secretary coming back. A conversation held within the confines of Undercommon but they were dismissive sort of conversations centered on the whys and wherefores of different events and the ones that The Shadowhand was expected to attend on behalf of the Dynasty.

Per the Queen's request.

An hour beyond that, being left alone to pen out acceptances and missives-- the quiet scribble of his quill pen as he launched himself into a state of calm. Leaving Bren for the most part to spend time with his treasure and yes, to commit it to memory (though Essek had no inclination of just how clever the other man was when it came to such mind olympics. Though as afternoon was saying it's final farewells, that was when they returned to Essek's residence via the Transportation circle, back to the familiar warmth of the study where a warm fire would be started and a meal laid out on the table in front of it.

Complete with a dish on the coffee table for Bren's own sustenance, filled with pork cutlets, saurkraut and a bun that was generally salted on the top. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren allowed himself (as if it were a conscious decision and not something he had no choice about whatsoever) to melt at that praise, that touch. Again Essek would find only adoration glimmering at the depths of the blue pools of those sad eyes. But once Essek turned back to his tasks, Bren's attention would slip to the new book.

Time ceased to exist for Bren Ermendrud the moment he cracked open that book to the first page. It could have minutes or hours, and they passed in some suspended state where time moved blisteringly fast and did not move at all. He was aware of another presence, of a conversation, noting the words that he could pick out.

More parties. Hmm. He supposed that meant more time being seen with Essek's husband. Unfortunate thing that this was.

Back to the pages which were turned regularly as he devoured line by line, the very beginnings of understanding of the forces which Dunamancy sought to master. It was fascinating, and he could see the complementary places where it would align with transmutation, the places where the two schools also seemed to diametrically oppose one another. It was fascinating.

He was distracted when his master stood, indicating it was time to return to Essek's manor, but he closed the book (holding it quite tightly to his chest) and followed after him. Sleepiness at least had been forgotten.

And so was mealtime, since as Essek settled to eat and Bren settled in close, the book was opened beside his plate. Unfortunately the food had been overshadowed as he fed his mind instead -- even if he was tangentially aware that he was indeed hungry, and that it did smell very good.]

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek's own meal was taken with a book in hand although he did understand the importance of eating, so there were bites in between paragraphs as he paced himself. There was nothing that Essek loved better than a good book (though a bath did come very close), he did glance up mid bite once and noticed that Bren was not touching his food. Soundlessly, Essek slipped to his feet and then he stood next to Bren's side-- he leaned down and then his fingers curled in soft luxuriant locks.

And then very gently, he tugged Bren's head upwards.

It was gentle, but it was firm. ]

Pet, eat-- or else I will take that book away until you've completed your meal.. yes?

[ The drow's voice was stern and commanding, even as his fingers lightly stroked the back of Bren's scalp. ] You wish to please me and eating will please me.

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren was aware of Essek's proximity in the flash of a moment before those fingers where in his hair, before they were tugging. He lifted his chin immediately, gaze rising to his master and away from the page. His lips parted around a thoroughly embarrassing whimper that he heard himself make before he realized he'd even realized he'd voiced a sound.

Eyes wide, and face flushed at his own reaction, he nodded.]

Yes, Master. I'm sorry, I... was distracted. [He was still distracted, but now with the added bonus of being horny, but he focused.]

I will eat. [Because gods did he wish to please him.]

[zauberdecke]

After you eat, we shall discuss the continued punishment from last night.

[ Therefore bringing to mind the fact that Bren had already been punished with Essek's own nocturnal activities, those same activities that the drow had no clue that the Empire Pet had spied in on. ] I know you do not want to displease me however, I decided that it was in your best interest that I remind you to be mindful.

[ That was when Essek slipped back to his own chair to finish his repast, though he was watching-- Bren would be able to feel that gaze almost physically touch him, the weight of it like gravity. And Essek honestly did not mind too much that the Pet would be self-conscious over such scrutiny.

It merely encouraged Bren to be better. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[The mention of last night immediately brought that memory back to the forefront, the stolen glance of Essek writhing into his own touch beneath the blankets, to listening to the soft sounds, hitched breath and shaking exhales. His face turned a darker shade of pink, that he hoped Essek would chalk up to the mention of punishment.

He ducked his head and turned his attention to his meal.]

Thank you, Master, for the reminder.

[Oh he was desperate to be better. And he could feel that gaze on him, simultaneously heated and sharp as winter ice. His Master was a complicated being. So Bren's posture went a bit straighter and he kept his attention on the food rather than the page.]