"Broken Shards"

[zauberdecke]

"In the dark
I need to taste the blood
Go on, draw another line
We can cross this time."
- Blindfold by Sleeping Wolf

---



[ Essek Thelyss: Shadowhand to the Dynasty.

One who reached further then the Luxon would allow, who would do absolutely anything for knowledge. Oh no, the man did not care for power, not really. He wanted to cast himself into the portal of knowing, he wanted to surrender himself to books and learning without having to deal with the mundanities of socio-politics that all of the Kryn engaged in. It was tedious and it filled him with sickness even as he plastered on an urbane smile for all and sundry to see.

Within the Dynasty, it was customary to take pets of the Empire; they were brought in across the border of Asarius, across the mountains and into the Dynasty. There were Dynasty born pets on the other side, both lost to the ravages of the other's civilization, generally never to be seen again.

Essek had never really had an interest to begin with when it came to pets; at the market he carefully avoided the slave blocks where those not of the Dynasty were paraded around. However, it had come to this-- it had come to his trading of the Beacon, and in return he recieved a Volstrucker to serve him. And yet, for all of that, Essek Thelyss had not thought he would receive a broken Volstrucker.

In fair trade, he and recieved a dossier on the man in question and had perused it with only a small semblance of annoyance while Trent Ikithon had assured him that a man like him could be rebuilt, the honeyed words of a silken snake which Essek recognized.

After all did not a predator recognize another predator? So now he held in his household a man whom had to be guarded carefully, though Essek was not cruel despite how he imagined Dynasty pets were treated, the cage that he had placed this Volstrucker named Bren within, well it was comfortable-- he'd seen pictures of Vergossen so he supposed it must be far better than that place. But he had not precisely interacted with him-- most of his unseen servants were given the walking of him, the care and maintenance of him.

Perhaps because he did not precisely know what to do with him, or what use he had for something broken. Though he arguably did not know what manner of broken the Volstrucker was, but after a week-- he decided perhaps it was time to summon him and see for himself; acertain what sort of work was cut out for him.

If this man was worth putting back together again.

So it was one evening, he had the Empire man summoned to his chambers. ]

Comments

[ausgebrannt]

[Essek did not move from his lap, and Bren could not decide if this was a blessing or a curse. It was probably an equal mix of both, if he were honestly assessing it. His neck did feel strange without the collar around it, though he thrilled with being rid of Ikithon's metaphoric touch. His gaze, still fixed on Essek, softened at the words, and he ducked his head. It had been a long time since he'd spoken, and even then that had been a brief break in a decade of silence and catatonia. He wrapped his fingers around the glass of water to take a sip, to remind himself how to voice words.]

I will never be his again. [His voice was rough from disuse, but still a soft tenor, clipped at the ends with the telltale touch of a Zemnian accent. His own voice sounded strange to his ears after so long without it, but he continued.]

But ja, I am yours.

[Spoken out loud now, a confirmation, a promise of that fealty, that submission, that growing dedication that he could feel swelling in his chest.]

Thank you.

[zauberdecke]

You will never be his again.

[ There was finality there, like the closing of a door on a chapter of Bren's life. There was no need for the past here, not the past as Ikithon had narrated it- He sat back, but only a little as he took in the raspy timbre of Bren's voice, used to little talking. ] I will have to trot the collar out occasionally though it will never be around your neck.

[ His fingertip curled underneath Bren's chin then and he turned it so that he could regard the other man, the way that the voice somehow matched the appearance-- rich and warm, and yet soft. He had expected soft, perhaps it was those eyes all sad and melancholy. ]

I accept your gratitude, you will pay me back by being perfectly obedient to me-- so far I have had no cause for complaint; however, I hope that your newly-found voice will still be tempered until I say that you may use your words.

[ausgebrannt]

[A flicker of a smile over his lips as Essek echoed the words. Gods help him, but he trusted this man. More than just being drawn to him, more than clinging to scraps of kindness when he'd been so starved for it, he trusted Essek Thelyss to mean the words that he said, the promises that he had made. He could abide the collar's presence, and would happily make use of it against Ikithon and his spying attempts, but he was relieved to know he would not be expected to wear it. He would wear Essek's collar quite gladly, would accept even the grip of those graceful, slender fingers around his throat without anymore more than murmured gratitude.

He found himself lifting his chin at that gentle pressure, meeting the drow's gaze with his own.

Bren looked at the other man in undisguised veneration in blue eyes, peering through half-lowered lashes still darkened by the makeup, the shimmer of gold still present on his eyelids. It was a coquettish glance, even if Bren certainly did not intend it to be -- could not have done it if he intended, in all likelihood, awkward anxious disaster that he was on the best of days. But it paired perhaps a bit too well with the soft, almost breathless agreement of,]

Siyo, Veldruk.

['Yes, Master.']

[zauberdecke]

[ He was not immune to the inherent prettiness of his Pet; oh no-- he'd casually wondered what sort of sounds the man would make when.. but ah, perhaps those were confusing thoughts and tangled up with his own experiences in the bedroom (which were, non-arguably, not fond whatsoever), it almost brought to mind his own tolerating grimaces and slightly uncomfortable hissings followed up by annoyed swats and pushes in demand for Adeen to get off of him as soon as possible.

But still, he was beautiful with the makeup clinging to that face, those beautiful blue eyes that were so tender. Nothing like Adeen, and perhaps that is what enticed him, despite himself-- what had given route to such rogue thoughts. ]

Would you like to write in your notebook for the remainder of the evening, Pet? I have correspondence to read and books to peruse; for being such a good boy at the party tonight, I think that you deserve a little relaxation time of your own.

[ There was Essek, heaping rewards on Bren, patiently and indulgently-- a far too kind Master. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren had no expectation at all that his master would find him at all attractive, never mind beautiful. Admittedly, he hadn't caught sight of himself with his currently makeup accented features yet, but how could someone as exquisitely, ethereally, beautiful as the Shadowhand possibly look at a scrawny freckled ginger and see anything worth looking at?

He started to perk up at the prospect of relaxing with his journal, but the praise, the being thought of as a good boy ate at him. There were things that Essek did not know, after all. Things that he by all rights out to know.

Bren couldn't help but drop his gaze, guilt and shame conspiring to redden his cheeks.]

You're too generous. I don't deserve anything so kind. There are things you do not know, things I should tell you. I deserve to be punished, not rewarded.

[Well. He'd broached the subject now, the proverbial floodgates of confession and begging for forgiveness were about to open.]

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek heard Bren's own words, the way that they enunciated-- the subtle shift of shame behind them and then the downcast eyes that bespoke that the other man had something weighing on him. He had seen the way that Bren had punished himself already, taking it into his own hands. Likewise, he also knew that this man would find some way to punish himself.

As his Master, it was up to Essek to hear out his crimes.

And judge him in accordance.

The weight of Essek was taking off that lap and then he stood there before he pointed to the ground and with a very firm command, he spoke. ] Sit.

[ Once Bren complied with the demand, that was when Essek would resume sitting in the wing chair much like an imperious empress would. ] You would tell me all of them, Pet. I will be the one who will weight the seriousness of these crimes.

[ He would judge them, but likewise he would keep in mind that Bren was clearly the type that desired to be punished, it was like a craving in him that he could recognize-- had recognized the first time Bren had knelt in shame before him. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren immediately missed the proximity, the weight of the drow in his lap. But he did not deserve that either. No. And better it come out now before it festered away inside him, before his master came to think he was intentionally hiding his indiscretions.

That single word command had him in motion. He slipped from the chair, taking a position on his knees, sitting back on his heels, hands clasped and eyes not daring to lift to meet Essek's.

Somehow this was easier when he'd been mute and writing.]

Even if it was meant for show earlier, your words were true. I am nothing more than a dirty slut. The way I have looked at you, the thoughts that fill my mind. They are... I am a filthy whore. You saw it first hand this morning. But it goes beyond that. Last night, I made thought into action. I brought myself to release when you sent me to wash, with my thoughts on my master where they should not have been, do not deserve to go. I am sorry.

[zauberdecke]

[ He was prepared.

And yet, Essek was not truly prepared for the deluge that came from those lips-- their pitch and how they went from nearly calm to somewhat anxious at the revealing. There had been some falters, those eyes not meeting his own gaze though there was nothing he could've tethered his gaze to other than this. He tapped his fingers against the arm of the chair lightly as he considered. ]

You will look at me and you will tell me exactly what went through your mind as you were committing your crime last night.

[ And.. he wanted to know, strangely enough. He wanted to know what sort of thoughts this Pet could have of him while he was washing himself. Also, he wanted to know what he was punishing Bren for as it was clear that his pet needed that punishment to make himself feel better. ] When you are confessing your sins, you will always look me in the eyes-- I want to see your shame for what you've done.

[ His voice soft. ] Tell me--

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren peeked up at him, tentative at first. It brought back the memories of this morning, of Essek watching his humiliation and shame with that cool and casual seeming disinterest while Bren has abased himself so thoroughly for his master's observation. Face turning a brighter shade of red, he met that gaze in all its intensity.]

I... I thought of your voice, of your calling me a good boy, of knowing I'd pleased you. I thought of your hands and the riding crop striking my ass. I thought of your voice telling me what a filthy thing I was for what I was doing.

[It was a struggle not to look away, but he would not disobey. His master had given him an order and he would do as he was told. His voice trembled as he continued.]

I imagined your hands on me, your beautiful hands. I imagined you using me as you wished, taking your own pleasure from me so that I might actually be of some use. I thought of what you might feel like inside me, and what you might taste like on my lips. I imagined a million things I will never be worthy of.

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek watched Bren paint those words in colours of intrigue; he dissected them as he managed to draw them into a concise line of meaning. Bren wanted to please him, that was at the core of it. And for the first time in what felt like forever, perhaps it was forever, he felt a stirring underneath his dressing gown, and gods he managed a thankless gratitude toward their normally unyielding ears for gravity incarnate, that he did not show precisely that he was being affected in quite this way.

His eyes felt overly bright, the golden within them expanding to a cat's backglow-- luminescent eyes.

But Bren needn't know what that meant, did he?

The Shadowhand picked his tone carefully, as he felt a coiling blossom from his stomach and curl at his inner thigh, causing him to shift ever so slightly in his seat-- lean forward a tad. ] You really are a dripping wet Puppy who cannot control himself nor his own impulses, aren't you? [ His voice soft, it felt dangerous, this line but he was playing into that narrative, he was tossing firewood onto the flames that was his Pet, Bren. ] I think the first thing you need to do, Pet-- is to apologize for being such a pathetic and depraved little Puppy...

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren had no idea that Essek was at all affected or interested in any of this. He had no reason to even think that was a possibility. For all his expectations, Essek would be disgusted by him, by his base and filthy forbidden fantasies.

But oh he wants to please him in any way that he could. In his wildest dreams, clearly, that also meant sexually, meant letting his master make use of him as an object of pleasure. But again, these were fantasies and ones he did not deserve to be having.

His eyes widened at the words, but he nodded. A sheen of tears stirred up by the shame, the humiliation of confessing his sins, his dirty, base transgressions.]

I am sorry. I am so sorry, Master, for being such a filthy, depraved thing. You deserve better than a worthless slut who can only think of his own shameful desires. Please forgive me for being such a dirty whore. I'll do anything I can to atone, to earn your favor back. Please.

[zauberdecke]

[ Perhaps Essek allowed the silence to go on a little long there while he listened to Bren's pleas, his ardent and fevering wishes to make it right. If Bren had a tail, it would be both slumped and wagging, he knew this for a fact. He bit his forefinger lightly in consideration while he watched the other man, though he was pleased by the fact that Bren did not look away.

Good Pet--

He glanced over to where his riding crop lay neatly on top of one of the tables, considering. Then he came right back so that his gaze slid to Bren's. ] I want you to go on your hands and knees and fetch that for me, and then come back to me.. still on your hands and knees. [ There was instructions in between the lines, if Bren was clever enough to intuit them out. ] You are deserving of punishment, that is what you are fit for with all of those shameful thoughts-- so I will give you precisely what you want, like the Filthy Pet that you are.

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren's gaze flickered to follow his master's, catching sight of the crop. As if he could miss it. A shiver swept through him before he could even realize it. His voice has been released from its silence now, and a soft whimper slipped free, betraying him.

A nod of understanding at the order, and at the unstated instruction tucked in between. He leaned forward onto his hands and knees and crawled that way across the room to where the riding crop lay on the table.

Careful and deliberate and with a fair amount of delicate precision, he took the crop between his teeth -- he'd need his hands for crawling and naughty puppies didn't have hands for using anyway -- and turned to make his way back on hands and knees to his master. That sheen of tears and shame still lingered in his eyes, but they were accompanied there with poorly disguised arousal and a perhaps pathetic glimmer of hope for being punished and made better, forgiven for the shameful filthy thing he was.

He crawled back to Essek, eyes seeking out his owner's as he sat back on his knees in front of him, chin lifted to offer the crop still held in his mouth.]

[zauberdecke]

[ very good, it appeared that Bren did understand the assignment in its full totality, he watched the way that Bren scrambled; not the most graceful it was true but he made a good effort to be eager and yes to do the correct thing that his Master wanted.

Essek had never seen a pet as obedient as was like this, and he was more than a little charmed when Bren came back with crop in teeth and a hopeful look cast in those sad blue eyes. The want and desire to be better, to be what he wanted him to be-- it was (clearly) arousing.

The Shadowhand leaned over to pluck the crop from his teeth though gently, still gently-- because he did not want to hurt Bren, or cross a boundary aside from what was explicitely stated. ] I think it is presumptuous for you to think that any of your filthy holes could please me when nothing else has ever done so.

[ A subtle hint that he did not enjoy sex-- with others, too many complicated feelings regarding them, some of them sparked nausea.. some angry, and others ambivalence; all in equal measures. ]

Strip. You will get the crop because naughty and desperate whores do not deserve the grace of my palm.

[ausgebrannt]

[Still gentle, even when being stern, even when Bren rather thought he deserved the pain. Pain had come to him from Ikithon for no reason at all, at least none were more than Trent's fickle, sadistic training methods. It had never been consequence or fair, only cruel. Was it any wonder he was so in awe of his new master and the fairness and sense in his words and actions.

With his mouth free, he ducked his head, another flush of shame.]

I know. I'm sorry, Master.

[Well, thinking about it. He knew that it was absurd for him to think he'd be capable of pleasing Essek Thelyss, of being something the drow could want. But the way those words were phrased, it was impossible to miss that hint that sex was not something his master liked.

Which clearly made the fact that he was such a shameful, filthy slut all the worse. Bren stripped out of his clothes, folding them carefully, never leaving his knees in the process. He turned to Essek not sure how this would go.]

Please punish me.

[zauberdecke]

[ For all that Essek thought the act was needlessly messy and inconvenient, he did have to admit that there was a pleasing symmetry to Bren's form. He did not dare think that it could be different when it really hadn't been proven as such to begin with, he held no expectations and no real hope-- but he understood that his Pet had a few buttons that were purely sexual in nature.

He wondered.

And then pushed a bookmark into that thought-- for later. That could be dwelled on when there wasn't more pressing needs. ]

Kneel over the coffee table, just like before--

[ He was going to take his time with this, just enough to build that slick anticipation-- he wanted to see that pulse at the beck flutter, perhaps it even pleased him to know that this Empire Puppy desired him, wanted him above all reason, there was a certain bit of power there that he did not get.. normally. ] And after you are positioned, I want you to beg for the punishment, tell me how much you thirst after it-- to be absolved of all your sins, knowing that they will come back and you will never be satisfied.

[ausgebrannt]

[Bren moved as instructed, ever obedient, ever ready to do what his master has bid him to do if he had any chance of pleasing him, of atoning for the filthy thing that he had done, the filthy thing that he was. He settled himself over the table as he had before, naked and vulnerable and trying not to do something even more terribly humiliating like winding up with a hardon.

He hung his head, a shaky breath before he spoke.]

Please punish me, Master. I need to be punished. I have been wicked and dirty and pathetic, unable to control myself. I am a filthy whore, but I want to be better. I need you to discipline me so I can be better... so I can be forgiven. I want to please you again. Please punish me. Please hurt me. I deserve it.

[His heart was racing, fluttering away like a desperate bird in the cage of his chest.]

[zauberdecke]

[ Essek found himself both charmed and tender toward the way that Bren begged for it so deeply, so plaintively. This was not play, this was rooted in something psychological; like he believed that he deserved everything negative or painful that he was given.. and none of the mercy or grace.

Honestly, Essek did not have such a revulsion when it came to thoughts of Bren masturbating-- even less when it was to thoughts of himself. If Adeen had admitted such things, the reaction would'vd been instant and ugly-- visceral.

So Essek got to his feet, standing then behind Bren and watching the skin splayed for him. Three strokes, he felt, would not be sufficient in the slightest-- so he counted to three, his voice melodious so as to give Bren time to prepare and brace, and then the first strike came downward within a rush and a flurry, to assault freckled flesh. ]

Filthy and lewd whores deserve punishment for their sins, deserve to feel the crop of their Master.

[ another countdown, and another precise strike-- this time on another section of rear spaced enough apart that it would not land on tender crop-loved flesh. He was carefully monitoring all of Bren's signs though, he would stop when it became 'enough' ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Essek saw him too clearly, straight to the core of those broken pieces of himself. Bren was certain he deserved the pain, the punishment. That made so much more sense than the kindness, the praise, the comfort. What of him was worth the trouble? Whatever the reason, there was something grounding about this, about putting it into his master's hands, about trusting the drow to give him what he deserved.

He heard that counting, the lilt of that Xhorhasian accented voice, could feel himself tense as Essek drew closer to three. The rop struck skin, sound registering before the snap of pain, the sharp sting against his skin. His breath caught, a faint flinch in him. He exhaled the breath in a shaky sound before he found his voice.]

Thank you, Master. Yes. Please. I deserve this punishment.

[He deserved each and every sting of that crop, deserved the shame of being bent over with his ass on display, vulnerable and pleading to be corrected. His cock, currently trapped beneath where he lay across the table, was at least hidden, so there was no visible sign that it also responded to the kiss of that crop against his skin, the humiliation and the pain of it.]

[zauberdecke]

[ For right now Essek was focusing on the task at hand, making sure that he dished out the appropriate amount of punishment that he thought that Bren deserved. If he used Bren's litmus test then it would be far longer and stronger, but this was also a lesson in trust. That Bren trust him to know exactly how much would be warrented.

Another strike, the third one. Though this time Essek was not stopping at three, no-- this next one, the fourth one struck without a count, at another spot just underneath the rear, hitting the sweet cleavage but managing to avoid other more sensitive areas.

It was clear that Essek was precise. ]

That is a Good Boy, thanking me for this punishment-- I am the only one who will punish you like this, correct?

[ausgebrannt]

[Another muffled sound at the next strike, noting that Essek was, even in this, Essek was exercising caution, exercising care with him, with each strike finding new unmarked skin, leaving pain but not damage in its wake. It was that care, that grace, even more than the pain or shame, that brought the tears up in Bren's eyes, where his head was hung forward.

The praise, that good boy drew the first sound of a sob from him. It also stirred that more shameful something in him, that first hint of arousal, like a pavlovian response.]

Ja. Yes, only you, Master... only you I... thank you.

[There was something freeing about that, in all its irony, a freedom in relinquishing all control to this man who owned him. He'd try to be worthy of it, to be good. Gods he wanted to believe that he could be.

[zauberdecke]

[ It was hard not to allow those words to dance from Essek's lips, the approving words about how Bren was such a good boy for him prostrating like this, accepting the pain and the vein of pleasure that came along with it. He could hear those whimpering sobs, the statement that he wanted to be good, that he wanted to be punished only by Essek.

Which caused a thrill to go through him, unlooked for but no less wonderful. It caused a bite to run down his spine, that seemed to nearly be connected to this Pet. And he was being thanked so prettily, so charmingly that how could Essek not be overwhelmed by it.

No matter, there was a connection that was being formed between them in the here and the now.

Another lash, this time against the hip, but this one a little lighter, marring with pink the freckled skin while he felt his breath puff lightly in something akin to arousal-- as well. ]

[ausgebrannt]

[Tears had overflowed his eyes now, but they were from relief as much as pain, that he was being punished, corrected, that somehow the lick of the crop against his skin could piece by piece brush away the worst of his sins and transgressions. He'd be sitting gingerly for a while, reminded of the punishment by the lingering sting and tenderness, but he liked that too.

More than he should.

There was that insistent and humiliating stirring in his cock, as if the pain and humiliation were as good as foreplay, and that was going to be a problem. He squeezed his eyes shut as if he could will his body to obey him, to behave. At least he was mostly keeping himself still and not squirming against the table he was prostrate over.

Mostly.]

Please Master... please forgive me. I want to be good for you.

[zauberdecke]

Perhaps if you groveled at my feet and kissed them, I would have some mercy on you.

[ That came out before Essek was able to exactly monitor what he had said-- and yet now the idea was out there, cast out on the sea of such wonderful ideas that erred on the side of hubris. His feet, prettily painted and manicured-- with the softest skin to them, right now currently clad in bedtime sandels, silver as the laces wound halfway up the calve. ]

Perhaps I should make you kiss my feet, let your pretty tears bath them-- maybe then I will be moved to forgive every single transgression.. for now.

[ausgebrannt]

[Oh that sure as hells was out in the open air, and Bren could feel the new flush of heat that thought had surging through him. Had he ever considered anyone's feet before? Not that he could recall, but the idea of being allowed to touch his master, any part of his master, allowed to press his lips to Essek's skin, how could that be anything but thrilling.

He lifted his head and chanced a glance back at the drow.]

Please? Let me kiss your feet? Let me grovel and beg for your forgiveness, even if I don't deserve it. Please, Master.

[His face was tear-streaked, eyes still watery, but there was that hopeful spark in them, that he could earn that absolution, could find a way to please his owner .