: Hanahaki - Guess I'll Just Die :

[blackradley]

It was truth that Alec was not as restless as Seregil was; their little place on Half Moon Street was well lived in, though the treads in the carpet were not from Alec, not even remotely. Alec could be content to just sit in a wing chair and read, in dreaming-- in moving through books and ideas all of the ways that the world had not opened up for him before his first meeting with Seregil.

Though he did miss Seregil's presence, the chaos in the other side of the room; in all of his soliloquys and ramblings, his plotting and scheming.

The rain pattered outside, and Ruetha had found a good thing in his calmness. Her goal of comfort was to spend days in Alec's lap, and then cuddle in with Seregil at night and he supposed, as he scritched just behind her ears, that it must be a very sweet deal indeed. Thankfully she allowed him just enough time to turn the page before he returned back to his ministrations.

A lock of blonde hair fell in his eyes, those blue eyes that managed to convey so many emotions-- both wonder as well as stubbornness; but this time calm. Occasionally he would have to let out a cough which he covered with his hand-- not precisely noticing the petal that disguised itself within his palm before it fell casually and wedged within the couch cushions where one would find a veritable sea of them hidden underneath.

He thought about getting up to go search Seregil out, though he thought perhaps the other man did not want to be disturbed. Tried not to think about if Seregil was at the Avenue of Lights, perhaps in the arms of his green eyed boy. No, best not to think about that, he'd only be setting himself up for a long train of thought that he was not prepared to board.

So he sat there, whiling away the moments.

Comments

[blackradley]

They may indeed never get it out of their system, always searching for privacy.. a place where they could twine like the symbol of forever, until it felt like they were the Talimenos bond in seriousness, unable to be extricated. Because of living among people for so long, it was easier to adopt that at a sooner age than most Faie did. And he felt it pull at him though he did not know precisely what it meant, just that it meant.

The pace quickened and he knew that he would not last, the clever wrist working him as it worked the glistening precome into flesh. This was not the curiosity of someone who'd not touched a prick before.. but someone who knew what to do to drive someone to madness.

"You are...." but he could not form the words because his mind was going so very stupid with desire-- much like a stag did during mating season.

[rhimineecat]

Seregil found himself so swept up just in the sight of Alec like this, coming undone. So often the blond was the staid and stoic between the two of them, cool still water that lay quiet and placid but hid depths and dangers and strength that ran infinitely deep. To see him like this, that self control frayed, need and lust writ obvious in his expression, in the angles and shapes his body took as he moved, chasing pleasure.

"Illior's eyes, you are even more lovely like this than I imagined." And oh he had imagined, albeit guiltily, in his weaker moments. He'd never intended to ask Alec for this, for more than the friendship which the other had given so freely, and that had changed Seregil's existence so much for the better that he wondered if Alec began to understand the extent.

His hand continued to work over him, and he had planned to bring him off this way, so he could watch the way ecstasy played out on those much beloved features. Yet here he was, and his own self control had frayed, and he'd never been terribly good at denying himself when there was no true reason for it.

So without another word, he leaned in, hand still stroking over that shaft, but he with no small amount of eagerness, wrapped his lips around Alec's cock.

[blackradley]

Alec i Amasa wondered if he had died and gone to heaven. Certainly it felt like it the moment Seregil leaned over and took his cock in mouth, and oh gods his fingers clenched in hair, in anything that he could find purchase in as Seregil took it upon himself to make himself the best lover that Alec had ever had (which was actually a company of three (him included) and so he sank down further into the bedcovers while he felt the conjoined efforts of Seregil's hand and mouth working him over.

It felt different, this time. It felt free and natural, there was nothing stilted in it-- no expectations that he was worried he would not meet, because he trusted the Aurenfaie, knew that Seregil would have his best interests at heart.

And clearly in other ways too.

Alec all but melted into that hot mouth, trying to lean up to see but he was unable to and perhaps it was just because he was still trying to figure out where to put his limbs which was a touching sort of awkwardness. "Yeah Tali, this is going to make me..." this would absolutely further the cause to get Alec to turn into a ruined mess on Seregil's bed.

[rhimineecat]

Alec i Amasa was not allowed, under any circumstances, to die regardless of what paradise might await his bright young soul. Seregil would not stand for it, not for several centuries from now when they'd both finally old and gray and weathered by time. And even then, he understood himself a selfish enough man to hope that he went first.

Now was not the time for thoughts of death. Well, little deaths maybe, but those were very different, and very much on the agenda.

He moaned around Alec, at the first taste of him this way, intimate and carnal, salt and skin and that faint bitterness that struck his tongue the same way a particularly dry wine would -- though much more dangerously intoxicating. Seregil's cheeks hollowed around him and he rather insistently tongued along sensitive flesh.

His gaze flickered upwards to Alec at the sound of that sweet voice. Even with his mouth very occupied, it was clear in silver eyes that he was smirking quite smugly, and he gave a very deliberate suck as if entreating Alex to let go, to spill himself for Seregil.

[blackradley]

There was something about those silver eyes, glimmering like a cat's that sent him over the edge.

He had been ultimately destined not to last long, of course he wouldn't not with Seregil looking at him like so, he spasmed and every single iota of seed managed to loose itself inside that mouth. He gripped the shoulders and arched himself while his hips pumped shallowly, he was nearly sobbing with the pleasure of it, with Seregil getting an amazing view of his neck as he pressed his head back against the pillow, his legs shifting and his toes curling into sheets.

The amount was large and very thick, perhaps because he did not know how to spend most of his seed aside from the very few times he had.

Panting, gasping, as if he had just completed a mile-long run-- and with the remanants of his load, gods knew where it went as Alec had blacked out in that point of orgasm that shivered through him like a prayer made flesh. He swallowed thickly, his voice a bit wobbly

[rhimineecat]

Ah there he was. Seregil watched as closely as he could from his current vantage point as Alec found his climax, the way that lean body arched like a bow pulled taut, like the weapon Alec himself favored. Illior's light, there was something entirely divine in the other man. And yes, perhaps there was a small sliver of blasphemy in there, but Seregil was a fool in love, so maybe he could be forgiven for that.

He swallowed quickly around him, surprised yes by the amount of spend that he found spilling from his lover, but Seregil's mouth was a talented thing in several ways (if he did say so himself, which he indeed did say, when asked, or when he had a chance to offer the information unprompted) so he managed to weather the torrent.

Drawing slowly off his length, Seregil glanced down at him, not moving far from where he was, his hand still soothing over his prick, the now saliva and come slick skin. His tongue flickered out to sweep the small trail of seed that had slipped free, chasing the taste of this beautiful creature that he loved and who against all odds -- and against all good sense, of which Alec was normally possessed of so much -- loved him in return.

"Are you still with me, tali?" A teasing lilt in his tenor voice, like he was halfway into a song with the speaking.

[blackradley]

"Mmmmm?" he responded, he was never one for excess words; everything that he spoke generally had a rhyme or reason about it, however for right now he was a bit dumb and that was the orgasm that had made him so. Though he was quick enough to reach for Seregil's arm so that he could tug him up on the bed so that they could lay together.

"I will be better when you are close."

This was truth, he desired intimacy and closeness and Seregil had promised him that. But he did bite down a bit of jealousy at how good Seregil was at sucking his prick-- but wisely he was not going to say anything because well, that would be counterproductive and would waste the time that they had.

Seregil was here right now, wasn't he. That was the treasure and the gift.

[rhimineecat]

Ah well, there was perhaps the sweetest thing that Seregil could have hoped to hear. There was not a single ounce of resistance in him as Alec tugged him closer. He was all too happy to shift up along that delightfully sated body and settle in beside him, tucked quite close to him, letting one of his legs drape over Alec's, soft and tender. Maybe a little possessive.

"Yes, this is better." Alec was right. His hand came to rest against the blond's chest, fingers playing over his skin, tracing some imaginary script there.

Somewhere between smug and self satisfied and maybe surprisingly tentative. "You liked it?"

It wasn't that he doubted his talents as a lover. At all. But then, this had been an exploration of Alec's desire, and if it could stir for another man the way it did for a woman. And Seregil wanted to be sure, to know for certain he wasn't reaching for more than his beloved wanted to give.

[blackradley]

"I did..." Alec said, attempting to get his head on straight. Woefully hard though because it appeared he was easily distracted by Seregil's touch that ran light raindrops against his chest; yes-- very distracted by that. He sighed contentedly and then chanced a peek up at Seregil, and caught the tentative look there.

Very little of the cockiness.

That was how Alec knew that it was serious, the emotions that played over Seregil's features.

"Though I think that maybe I should not like it with others.." he was attempting to find his words. Something in his instincts told him as much, that this man was special. His instincts were rarely wrong when it came down to it.

[rhimineecat]

Seregil would prefer it if Alec did not get his head on straight so much as get his head on bi, given the matter at hand. It was fine. So he was not going to stop the touching unless Alec gave him some sign he wanted it to end, which did not seem to be the case at the moment at least.

If Alec paid good enough attention he might realize that Seregil was just tracing the letters of his own name over and over again in various directions and areas on his chest. His. His Alec.

There was a flicker of relief on his face at the I did, though when Alec continued, his brows knitted briefly in uncertainty. "No? But you do with... me?" And then, quieter, the real uncertainty that lingered here in him, "But not because you feel like you... owe me somehow?" Because he had played the part of mentor, teacher, after all, and he did not want to think that clear imbalance of influence was part of this.

It had taken him long enough in the first place, long before thoughts of being in love had ever occurred to him, to get Alec past the fact that he had nothing to repay him for, not for saving his life, not for providing him with the supplies and weapons he needed to exist in this new life.

[blackradley]

There was not an indecisive bone in his body, what there was however was a tendancy to weigh things carefully and thoroughly. There has been too much attraction there, too much of himself being jealous of men that got to have a part of Seregil that he did not. He did not make moves unless he'd made his mind to do so.

"No, this is not some sort of debt repayment-- you would not ask that of me because despite what you claim, you do have honour." He knew how self depreciating Seregil could be when he got into his head." He reached up to curl his fingers through locks of unbound hair.

"What I meant is that I do not want anyone else because I love you. Also I felt comfortable with you, and that made it very enjoyable because I trust you completely." He furrowed his brows at Seregil and then he continued.

"I think I felt like I owed you at the beginning but now, there is a partnership between us which has no place for debts and accounting."

[rhimineecat]

That seemed to be what Seregil needed to hear, some line of tension leaving him and allowing his lips to curve into a smile, with nothing to stop him from leaning just slightly into the touch through his hair. "Now, don't go extolling my virtues, tali. I've worked very hard to have precious and few of them."

So yes, self deprecating as if it were reflexive habit at this point in time.

But he let his own fingers lift to first brush Alec's hair back from his forehead, then trace a fingertip down along his cheek where he curled his fingers and caressed lightly with the back of his knuckles. "I love you too, deeply and wholly, and I always will." There was no way it could possibly be otherwise.

"And you're right. We are partners, friends. And even if you decide you no longer want me as a lover, we will be friends. If you want to take a wife, I will dote on your children and teach them all my best tricks and mischief so your hair will turn gray before its time." Seregil would, of course. He wanted Alec to be happy, but his dearest wish was that the other could find that happiness with him.

[blackradley]

There was Seregil, leaving him an out-- a way to be sad, though he did not think that it was dramatic. there was a part of him that wondered how that would work, them going from lovers and back to friends. Alec did not very much like the idea of thinking of that especially when he'd made his decision right here and now.. and yes, discovered that he liked what Seregil had done.

Quite a bit, in fact.

He gave the Aurenfaie a look that Seregil knew quite well by this point.

"I forbid you from thinking of anything beyond this moment, and maybe the next hour." Alec said simply as he curled his fingers at the back of his lover's neck and drew him back downward so that he could press an open-mouthed kiss to Seregil's. "I won't have you complicating the moment with things that may not happen but which you wish to think about as if it is some divine penance for goodness that you don't think you deserve."

Bullseyes did not always have to be pierced with physical arrows. "You are better served to kiss me, Tali."

[rhimineecat]

Leaving him an out, yes. And it was very dramatic, because it was Seregil, but it wasn't meant that way. More it was a protective reflex for him. He wanted Alec to have that escape if he needed it because, well, Seregil couldn't help but worry about being an albatross around his neck. But while he was quite certain it would shatter him if Alec moved on, he was reasonably sure he could at least survive that heartbreak as long as he could keep some piece of him, some small sliver of Alec's heart that would still allow him in it.

He might have abandonment issues. He probably ought to talk about them and work through them. But that wasn't going to happen, so here they were.

Except, here was Alec indeed firing killing shots without a bow in hand, piercing straight through the heart of the matter. Seregil opened his mouth to say something, but honestly, he found himself with no words coming to mind. Because Alec was exactly right, and how did you argue with that? Unfair. Entirely unfair.

Seregil loved him desperately for it, too.

"You forbid me, hmm? Quite the nerve you've gone and developed." He liked it. A lot. "You probably ought to keep my mouth occupied then, or else I might transgress..." So yes, the kissing, please and thank you, which Seregil was happily leaning in to do exactly that, half purring at the way those fingers curled against his neck, like Alec knew, rightly, that Seregil belonged to him.

[blackradley]

Alec would not keep something like a newly developed lover-like fondness from telling Seregil exactly what he needed to hear when he needed to hear it, even if it was not welcome. He was not blunt, and most of what he said usually was painted rather circumspect all told-- there were other people who could've gunned at the Aurenfaie far worse.

This came from a place of regard of which he was certain that Seregil did not consider for himself.

For such a peacock, Seregil was quite praise-averse and maybe that had everything to do with context, but still did not keep Alec from holding back.

"The nerve I have is the nerve you've encouraged in me." so yes, this was al Seregil's fault. Alec was himself, but parcel of that was a monster of the Night Runner's own creating. Mouth to mouth though as he drew Seregil back onto the bed, against him and then quite brazenly pressed his body close. For someone who was still exploring such things, he sure was a greedy thing-- which yes, also a good thing. "Best, yes." and then his tongue dived within, past those lips and he was curling his fingers in locks of hair as he wrapped his slender leg against one thigh.

[rhimineecat]

And thank Illior for that. Seregil had not known how much he needed Alec before the other man had come into his life, but oh he did need someone who could and did and continued to call him out on his not-infrequent bullshit. Oh yes, he'd still fuss and bristle about it at times because he was himself, but not so deep down he realized it was good for him. He was a better man for Alec's presence in his life.

Seregil breathed a laugh to those lips and all their damned audacity. "Mm... I'm ever the architect of my own undoing," he conceded before letting himself melt into the kiss, lips parting to welcome, to encourage Alec to explore, to take whatever it was he wished because Seregil was not only willing, but horribly eager to give it.

He shifted closer, like he fully intended on not allowing a single sliver of space to exist between their bodies if he could help it. His own arousal had not diminished even with Alec quite expertly putting him in his place, and he slipped an arm around the other man to press against his back, insistent and only mildly (okay, a little more than mildly) possessive.

[blackradley]

Oh, Alec did like that.

Also because of the pleasure he had experienced, he was rather pleased by the sign of Seregil's own arousal, reaching between them with his unoccupied hand so that he could stroke Seregil gently as they kissed, tongue sliding underneath tongue while he allowed sensuality to pass between them.

There was no denying the way that Alec had become more pliant in Seregil's arms, certainly receptive if the way that Alec's hips thrust upward in response to Seregil's hand possessive drawing against his back.

He was going to blush for even suggesting this but he'd try gallantly. "I want you..." and then quietly. "Inside me"

Alec was clearly going for throwing himself into things as he was wont to do-- right to the point, his own reasoning was that he wanted to try all aspects to evaluate if he found them pleasurable. For Seregil's sake just as much as his own; he rather thought he would enjoy being the penetrator all the time but it was important for him to KNOW if he would enjoy being on the recieving end.

Which he did not know yet.

[rhimineecat]

And there went his Alec as per usual, throwing himself headlong into everything he did. The boy did not have any option between think about it from every angle possible and all or nothing. He'd never seen Alec approach anything by halves, so really, why should he be surprised this was any different? Yet here was Seregil, who was distracted and breathless from that delightfully sensual and consuming kiss, trying to wrap his mind around what his lover had just said to him.

Oh. That. Well, yes. He had rather thought it would be best to ease Alec into things, start with what would be analogous to the little experience he'd had with women, but yeah nope, apparently full speed ahead. His own face was flushed as he drew back to look at him. "You're sure, tali?"

Because Illior save him, he very much wanted that. Then again, he wanted everything with Alec. Seregil himself was a fan of being on both ends of the act, his own sexuality coming down to the fact that he enjoyed giving pleasure, enjoyed receiving pleasure, liked pretty people of any or all genders -- and was discovering just now that having a deep bond of love made everything so much better, so much more. Being with Alec made it so much more.

[blackradley]

It was a translocation spell of the mind that was periodically cast, that allowed him to go from 0 to Instant Decision in as little time as possible and with absolutely no middle ground. He had a feeling that Seregil had been ready to ease him things, but Alec balked profusely at being at a disadvantage for very long. This was a disadvantage in his education, and now Seregil looked at him with a bit of incredulity in those storm cloud eyes.

"I've never been more sure in my life, Tali." he assured Seregil as he stroked his fingers through hair, allowing the touch and closeness to infuse the area around them. "You'll know if I don't like something." Alec assured Seregil, hoped that Seregil trusted him to know his own mind.

"And I also trust you to understand that if I don't like something, it is not a personal failing on your part." that was spoken with a warning, because even right here and now while they were both love-drunk, Alec meant business.

[rhimineecat]

There were several incredibly unfair things about this moment. First and foremost, the way that Alec was running his fingers through Seregil's hair was very distracting and wonderful and it made him want to do whatever Alec asked of him, and there would be no peace for Seregil if Alec realized that. Secondly, he clearly knew Seregil too well, calling him out so accurately. Third, he did all that looking like every boyhood fantasy Seregil had ever had about desire and love and forever.

He had no defense to any of it, at all, and he sighed softly, nuzzling his nose along Alec's. "You're a monster, I hope you know." His own personal precious monster.

With another stolen kiss, shorter and gentler but with no less passion laced through it. "But I want to be inside you very much, to make you mine this way..." And any other way he could think of. With that he shifted just enough to reach to fumble around on the cluttered chaos that was his bedside table, quite expertly and deftly snagging up a sweetly perfumed oil.

[blackradley]

A few things managed to yeet themselves off of the counter, little drops of chaos that endeared Seregil to him in such a manner that he would never have changed a single bit about the other man, because he was perfect the way he was; his eyes sparkled with softness in those blue eyes and he tucked a lock of hair back behind Seregil's ear.

"And I too.." he was finding that he was very aroused by the thought of closeness with Seregil and he didn't quite care how he got it-- was this love? Wanting to be as intimately close as possible. He smoothed his hand then against that stomach, upward upward until his talented fingers, the same that nocked a bow was now slowly massaging that shoulder.

"If I am a monster, then you are a.. well..." he found himself colouring ever so slightly, yeah.. his mind had gone there but then it stopped before it had quite committed too it.

[rhimineecat]

Seregil found himself already feeling a blossoming addiction for all these little touches, the brushing back of his hair, the way those fingers -- with the faint but unmistakable calluses from bowstring and arrow -- began that kneading at his shoulder. They'd already been fairly affectionate and free with small touches, Seregil having a fondness for ruffling at Alec's hair or slinging an arm around his shoulders. But this had a different flavor to it, all the more alluring.

When Alec started, and then abruptly stopped, in the middle of making a decidedly bawdy joke, Seregil broke into laughter, delight clear in the sound and in gray eyes as he looked down at the blond. "I suppose I am at that, yes. Or will be, shortly."

All aboard the monster fucker express?

Seregil's shoulders were still shaking in now quieted laughter. "You are precious, tali. Beyond any words I have to express it properly." That wouldn't stop him from trying though.

He pressed a kiss to those lips, then his forehead and finally the tip of his nose before sitting back on his heels and settling himself between Alec's legs, urging thighs to part for him.

[blackradley]

There was a huff from Alec, completely Alec in nature, though that was also tinged by the soft affection present in his cerulean gaze, the piece of himself that was inherent in the other. And wasn't Seregil an intrinsic part of him? They were twined by experiences and that was incredibly poignant to him. Alec spread his thighs and then allowed his palms to spread and touch along Seregil as if he was thirsty for absolutely anything.

"You are ridiculous.." however that was said affectionately and with such love in his voice.

Truth be told, he enjoyed touch-- was not sure of public displays of affection but he had a feeling he could grow slowly used to it even given the chance. "Maybe less teasing more action, Tali..."

[rhimineecat]

"I am. And it's part of my considerable charm," Seregil informed him, as he worked on opening up the bottle of oil that he'd snagged, looking down at Alec, entirely unapologetic in his high spirits right now. Don't mind him, he was apparently in peacock mode, preening prettily.

"Which, I admit I already knew was quite substantial, but I've surpassed even my own highest expectations this time, having charmed the most beautiful creature I've ever encountered into my bed. Even more impressive is that it seems I've worked my way into his heart too."

He made a bit of a show of drizzling the oil on his hand, working it in a slick sheen over his fingers, seeing if he couldn't warm it at least a little. A flicker of a grin tugged its way over his lips as Alec scolded him for teasing which, really, how could he have resisted?

"He's exquisite, you see. Outshining any jewel I've seen in any noble's treasury. His eyes alone put any sapphire that could ever be mined to shame with envy. I find myself wanting to write poetry across his skin with my lips. The sweetest music I have ever heard is when he calls me tali." He mused all this quite thoughtfully as he ran his unslick hand down Allec's thigh, urging those hips back just a bit.

[blackradley]

There was yet another snort from Alec though this time coloured by the comfort he felt in this moment; he'd though he would feel self conscious but the trailings of the talimenos bond flowed through him though he had no real word for it. Nakedness was natural in this moment and while he would never undress in public (or very reluctantly) his lover of silver eyes and silver tongue set him as such ease that it barely registered that the air caressed his skin.

Maybe a little flush as Seregil gazed at his body, his entrance and yes, his balls.

"You still remain ridiculous, Tali.. I stand by my words." And then he arched his hips upward while he groused good naturedly. "Also very dramatic, it makes me feel like we are on a stage and with people watching." He pulled the pillow to himself and then bit at it, smiling around it at the thought of being called beautiful.

"You very nice to look at yourself."